Addiction is like swimming upstream.
Addiction is like swimming upstream. Ron Crabtree

Our fish need an intervention: It’s always sad to see someone you care about go down a slippery slope. It’s sadder when it's your local Chinook salmon. Puget Sound fish are doing drugs. Our drugs. They swim through waters laced with our antidepressants, our antihistamines, ibuprofen, acetaminophen, and more. It’s no good, guys. The drugs slip through wastewater treatment plants and into our waterways. This is leading to stunted growth, a failure to thrive, and, consequently, early mortality for our native fish species.

The U-District upzone is here: The first U-District highrise proposal has a design review on Monday. The proposed building, The M, is a 24-story apartment building on the corner of Northeast 47th Street and Brooklyn Avenue Northeast. It will have 227 rental apartments. It all sounds nice, but it makes me sad. It's probably time to accept that the U-District we all knew and loved is now a thing of the past. If you want, make public comment about it on April 9th at 8pm at Good Shepherd Center, 4649 Sunnyside Ave N, Room 202 or you can email the planner, Crystal Torres, at crystal.torres@seattle.gov.

Sound Transit says escalators can be stairs sometimes: Remember a couple of weeks ago when the UW light rail station escalators shut down? Sound Transit was so against people using them as stairs that they forced people to use the elevators exclusively. Now, probably after some backlash, they’re re-evaluating that worst case scenario. Sound Transit says it might be okay to use the escalators as stairs only if the escalators are secured and workers are there as guides. Or, they’ll lead people down hidden emergency exit stairs.

Bike the viaduct: Join Seattle cyclists Sunday on the Emerald City Ride, a 12-mile loop that includes the Alaskan Way viaduct. This will be the first and the last time to ride it since demolition is slated for early 2019. No cars are allowed. It’ll be like a cyclist’s post-apocalyptic wet dream. You have until 5 p.m. today to sign up here.

Mae the Raccoon’s fate will be sealed today: The court case that will decide whether a domesticated raccoon can return to her West Seattle family is today. Mae is a raccoon who has lived with the Greer family for seven years. That’s illegal in Washington. Wildlife officials took Mae away from the Greers and she now resides at an animal rescue center. Unfortunately, she keeps getting into fights with the rescue’s other raccoon, Miss Kitty. The Greers say this is because she’s upset. There is so much drama.

The weather will be nice(r) today! Everything is relative. It'll be cloudy but it should be in the 60s and dry. Saturday is another story. It’s supposed to be wet and windy. I had a kickball game planned with my friends that day. I’m still going to play. Will my friends? Probably not. Anyone want to play kickball in the rain on Saturday?



The vegan burger that bleeds: The Bill Gates-backed company, Impossible Foods, has engineered a meatless burger that bleeds. They want to win over even the most dedicated meat lover. And they just might. According to people who have tried the so-called Impossible Burger, it's pretty fucking delicious. That’s good news since it’s way more environmentally friendly than a standard meat patty: “it uses 75 percent less water, generates 87 percent fewer greenhouse gases, and requires 95 percent less land.” It’s available in 12 restaurants in Portland and 1,000 locations nationwide.

Mariners pitcher is the chosen one: An eagle landed on him during the national anthem. He is our god now.


Hawaii legalizes medically assisted suicide: Doctors can now prescribe life-ending medication to terminally-ill patients who request it. Hawaii is the sixth state (plus D.C.) to legalize the practice.

Outdoors lover donates $1 million to Washington’s national parks: Bette Wallace bequeathed some of her estate to nature after she died. Now, her legacy is aiding the national parks she loved. The money will go toward a computer dispatch system at Mount Rainier and Olympic national parks to monitor rangers. The North Cascades national parks will use the money to improve infrastructure for volunteers.

Sanctions on sanctions: Seven oligarchs with ties to Putin are being sanctioned by the U.S. as well as twelve companies they control. Additionally, 17 senior government officials, a weapons trading company, and the Russian Financial Corporation are being hit by the measures.

Your daily pissing match update: No, no, not the pee tape. The not-quite Trade War with Trump and China. The back-and-forth continues. This morning, Trump said he wanted to consider an additional $100 billion in tariffs against China. Naturally, China said it would fight U.S. tariffs at any cost.

Nine new species discovered in the Amazon: For once we’re not talking about that Amazon. In November, a team of Brazilian scientists were granted access to a Brazilian National Park closed to visitors. There, they discovered nine new species. Most of them are frogs. They’ve given them fun nicknames. My favorite is the Plump Digger.

Press-hating president won’t be attending the correspondents dinner: Again. For the second year in a row, Trump will not be at the event celebrating the First Amendment. It’s probably hard to face a room full of reporters after you spend the rest of your time delegitimizing all of their work and their entire profession. God bless our cowardly, thin-skinned president.

Train full of shit just sitting in Alabama: It’s full of shit from New York and New Jersey residents. In February, it was on its way to a landfill in Adamsville, AL but the neighboring town won an injunction to keep the poop out of smelling distance. So, the train rolled on over to nearby Parrish, AL where there are no zoning laws. The cargo of crap has been sitting in a rail yard next to some baseball fields. Parrish is only two miles wide so everyone in town can smell the deuce caboose. To make matters worse, temperatures are expected to hit 80 degrees in mid-April.

Facebook's ad disclosures still don't add up: Facebook has been real slippery about disclosing its political ad data from the Seattle mayoral race last year. The data they have disclosed doesn't make much sense. According to Facebook, Nikkita Oliver, a candidate with a very strong Facebook presence, only purchased one Facebook ad and spent just $100. The Oliver campaign said that they definitely had more than one ad and spent more than $100. Other Facebook disclosures about other candidates — Cary Moon and Jenny Durkan included — are just as fishy.

Fun fact for your Friday: During a push-up, in the up position, you are lifting 69 percent of your weight. In the down position, you’re lifting 75 percent of your weight.

This weekend's best Seattle entertainment options include: The 5th Avenue Theatre's production of Kiss Me, Kate, the Edible Book Festival, and the closing of Jun Ahn: On the Verge.