Vlad on my mind
Vlad on my mind Getty Images

Seattle ICE lawyer faces prison time: Raphael Sanchez is facing sentencing for charges of stealing “particularly vulnerable” people’s identities. Sanchez, the former chief attorney for Immigrations and Customs Enforcement, exploited numerous immigrants by stealing their identities, opening bank accounts and credit cards in their names, and stealing “more than $190,000 from financial institutions,” reports the Seattle Times. A four-year prison sentence has been recommended. Sentencing is today. I don’t need Sanchez to be sentenced to be able to say I think he is a despicable and awful human being.

Fremont has lowest level of fear in Seattle: The crime rate is up there with the city average—about 60 per 1,000 residents. The fear-of-crime level is a 36.9 out of 100 in Fremont, though. Typically, in Seattle, the fear level is much higher than the actual crime rate. That’s due to “mean world syndrome,” a phenomenon where people hear about crime from outside sources like the news and social media and assume it’s lurking around every corner waiting to get them. This is a pretty big thing in wealthier neighborhoods where there is virtually no crime but there is a lot of fear.

Two long distance lovers will finally meet: Next month, it’ll be like that moment in Sleepless in Seattle where Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan finally meet on the Empire State Building after falling in love over a long distance correspondence. It’ll be exactly the same except replace New York City with Helsinki and replace Tom Hanks’ son with Mike Pompeo. Vladimir Putin and Donald Trump will be meeting one-on-one for the first time on July 16. It seems like a questionable political move especially since Donald Trump is still being investigated for his ties to Russia. The two have met on the sidelines of other summits but this will be the first formal summit between them.

$1 million in damages for accidental Georgetown barge fire: The Tuesday night blaze was ruled accidental. Two firefighters were hurt. By the time the fire was put out there were 80 firefighters total. That’s a pretty good hurt to not-hurt ratio in my book. Their injuries were minor, don’t worry. Most of the fire was extinguished in an hour, but crews were finishing up until noon yesterday.

How’s the river doing post-blaze? While firefighters battled the blaze, the Department of Ecology worried about the water of the Duwamish River. They have reason to believe there was oil on the boat that seeped into the water. Seattle Public Utilities deployed a spill team that responds to 1,200 spills a year. The team placed a containment boom around the area. Everything seemed okay with most of the firefighting foam dissolving and no recoverable oil. Still, what are the long-term environmental effects? The Department of Ecology thinks the impact will be negligible.

Ballard Locks, size queen: The longest and most girth-y ship ever squeezed itself through Seattle’s Ballard Locks yesterday. The six-deck Star Legend is 440 feet long and its widest point is 63 feet wide. KING5 took its drone to the skies to make this video. You definitely don’t need to watch all three minutes of it. Trim the fat next time, KING5:

Amazon wants to own the last mile: USPS, FedEx, and other shipping companies be warned. Amazon is starting a program that will conquer package delivery and rival traditional methods. The "Delivery Service Partners" program will allow anyone to run their own delivery business with a fleet of up to 40 vehicles and 100 employees, GeekWire reports. Every part of their operation will be Prime-branded.

Juneary is real: It’s not just a myth. June felt closer to January than it did summer this time around. It’ll continue to be cooler than usual throughout the last three days June has left on this planet. To those who noticed, yes I have adopted Juneary as a term now and forsaken my Californian "June Gloom" nonsense.

A look at the protest at the Northwest Detention Center: It's still going!

A look at a one-man protest in LA yesterday: This man, Dephree, climbed to the top of a traffic sign to protest pollution and also advertise a new music video.

He made a grand exit: Maybe we just need more creative protesting techniques here in Seattle.

Ivanka’s new China trademarks come at a convenient time: Her company got approval from China to register three trademarks on the same day her father—the President of the United States in case you’ve forgotten—agreed to lift sanctions on a Chinese telecommunications company. Ivanka, though no longer the head of her company, has not completely divested from it. The timing of both moves by father and daughter are highly suspect. As is everything with this presidency.

New Blabbermouth! Is Dan Savage Ready To Join The DSA? Listen to find out.

Smelly passenger actually had tissue necrosis: This guy boarded a plane from one of Spain’s Canary Islands (a very weird place) to Amsterdam. Passengers around him started vomiting and fainting because his odor was so putrid. The plane made an emergency landing in Portugal because of it. The man died soon after. It turns out he had contracted an infection and his body tissue was literally rotting.

South Korea becomes an honorary Mexican: Fútbol fans in Mexico swarmed the South Korea’s embassy as the country’s team defeated Germany and vaulted Mexico into the next stage of the World Cup.

Immigrant toddlers have been ordered to appear in court alone: Children as young as 3-years-old are being summoned to court to face their own deportation proceedings. Here’s a quote from the article by the Texas Tribune: “We were representing a 3-year-old in court recently who had been separated from the parents. And the child — in the middle of the hearing — started climbing up on the table,” said Lindsay Toczylowski, executive director of Immigrant Defenders Law Center in Los Angeles. “It really highlighted the absurdity of what we’re doing with these kids.”

Headline of the week: Elon Musk accused of stealing farting unicorn image

Now, an update from my alley:

I always hear this mysterious rolling sound late at night. I don’t know what it is. Someone with a shopping cart perhaps? A stroller? The kids from Nickelodeon’s Rocket Power shredding in my alley while the rest of the world sleeps?

I follow the sound as the person goes up and down. It’s so incredibly loud when it picks up speed near my house. That’s the other thing—speed. Whoever this is seems like they’re in a hurry because the wheels on this thing are really going. Then, just as quickly as it roars toward me, it fades to the smallest pinprick of sound. I lie in wait. Will there finally be peace? I never know and usually fall asleep in a tension-filled purgatory.

Two nights ago I looked for the first time when I heard the rolling. The sound had died right outside my window. I glanced through a sliver in my blinds and saw a man with a great big rolling trash can. He was lighting up a joint.

I watched as he rolled his trash can down the alley. He stopped at each house and inspected what it had to offer, taking this and that and placing it in his can like a reverse Santa Claus. He was a hummingbird stopping to suck nectar from each available flower. As he went, the sound got softer and softer. It was the first violin of the alley’s symphony, gently lulling me to sleep.

Tonight's best Seattle entertainment options include: A pre-release screening of the forthcoming Netflix documentary Three Identical Strangers, the Seattle Symphony's performance of Camille Saint-Saëns's Third Symphony, and the Prom Queen and Can Can culinary cabaret collaboration Femme Fatale.