They turned 10th Ave into a booze lawn.
They turned 10th Ave into a booze lawn. Lester Black

Though I've lived in the Capitol Hill/CD area since moving to Seattle in 2011, I've never attended a Capitol Hill Block Party. I had heard the block party was not actually a party for people who lived in the neighborhood, but rather a block swap with Bellevue. Previous attendees have described evenings full of gratuitous underbutt, sin, suburbans, medium-spicy music, department store perfumes, high prices, heat, and long lines. But I had also heard the festival wonderfully reframes the neighborhood, offering a fresh perspective on the same old brand new condos sprouting out of the ground, the beautiful brick landmarks we know and love, and even the Shell gas station. And surely some of the music was excellent, right? Right! (Especially if you listen to what Dave and Chase tell you to listen to.)

Register now: Free home buying seminars at Verity Credit Union on February 20 and 28.

Last night I found all of the above to be kind of true! Even though I only saw like 3ish sets, it was almost too much to take in. So I decided to condense my evening into a series of lists that will give you an idea of what you missed, happily or otherwise.

Ways People Were Trying to Get Inside Without Having to Wait in the Long Lines

• Sly cutting.
• Cutting with the remorselessness of a teen.
• Strength-in-numbers group cutting.
• Having their friend "Steve" come get them.
• Barreling through while pointing at wrist.
• Trying to pry apart the chain link fences while asking if I'd narc if they managed to get in.

Certain Travel Advantages of Being in ‘the Military’ According to Dude Behind Me in Line

• You can go to Korea with just an ID.
• A military ID. You don’t even need a passport.
• I’m serious, bro.
• Seriously my brother is in the military.

Surprisingly soft turf.
Surprisingly soft turf. Lester Black

Top 5 Surprises Upon Entering the Block Party

• Luscious AstroTurf beer garden!
• Ping pong table!!
• Some dude's vibrating vape pen full of weed!!!
• Making $8 selling loosies!!!!
• All the same people work at bars and restaurants I normally go to so they feel like friends to me!!!!

Navvi at Nuemos, making everyone swoon with brooding, sensual synths.
Navvi at Neumos, making everyone swoon with brooding, sensual synths. Lester Black

Favorite Musical Experiences Inside the Block Party

• Watching Melvv's set at a distance while drinking a post-line panic beer. There's something extremely calming about EDM from afar.
• Navvi's set at Neumos.
• Accidentally getting extremely high on that vibrating vape pen and trying but failing to have any thoughts whatsoever about the music of Dillon Francis.
• Finally having one thought about Dillon Francis's music but realizing it's a dumb thought. Here, see for yourself: Dillon Francis could do a great job narrating roller coaster rides. "Is everybody ready!? It's! About! To go! Down!"

Navvis cheetah.
Navvi's cheetah. RS

The Best Things About Navvi's Set at Neumos

• Glitchy cheetah moving in slow motion, which served as a perfect visual metaphor for Navvi's music.
• The fact that they sound like Tron FKA Twigs.
• Swimming in pink-purple lights while Kristin Henry swayed and sang with the voice of darkness angels.
• Laughing internally when guitarist/producer Brad Boettger hit the cowbell noise ~46 times on a sample pad during a song.
• Watching two people seduce an entire room with breakup songs.
• If you're 5 years late to the Navvi party like I am, pop a pot lozenge and have a little listen.

Types of Dancing Done While Waiting for Hot Dogs

• Aggressive shrugging.
• Making out.
• Arguing.
• Drinking out of three cups.
• Talking on the phone with finger in ear.
• White guy modified c-walk.

I will be petitioning the city council to make these lights a permanent fixture.
I will be petitioning the city council to make these lights a permanent fixture. RS