Originally published July 19, 2007.

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I'm 18 years old and my girlfriend and I have been engaging in sexual acts. She has no problem coming, but when it comes to sexual intercourse she can't orgasm. Is my penis not doing the job correctly? She says she feels good, but can't climax. Could there be something wrong with her? I don't know what to do.

The Lost Boy

Here's what you do, TLB: You play with your girlfriend's clit while you fuck her. Her clit, TLB, her clit. Play with her motherfucking clit. While you fuck her. HER CLIT. Play with her clit. If that's too difficult—too much like fucking and chewing gum with your fingers at the same time—encourage your girlfriend to play with her clit while you fuck her. HER CLIT. While you fuck her. Play with her clit.

And rest assured, TLB, there's nothing wrong with your cock or your girlfriend's pussy. Most women require additional clitoral stimulation during vaginal intercourse in order to get off—and if you stop stressing out and think about it, you'll realize the reason. But just in case you can't read and think at the same time, here it is: While you're fucking your girlfriend, the most sensitive part of your cock—the head—is getting direct, intense stimulation. But the most sensitive part of her sex organs—her clit—apparently isn't getting any, or isn't getting enough, direct, intense stimulation.

So, TLB, it could be that the positions you're fucking in don't provide direct stimulation to your girlfriend's clit, or your girlfriend's clit is positioned in such a way that no sexual position can provide the stimulation she needs, or she's one of those women—one of the majority—who requires focused, direct, intense stimulation in order to come. Which means, TLB, if you both want her to come during vaginal intercourse, then you'll have to incorporate a little manual stimulation into your fucking routine. Which brings us back to...

Play with her clit while you fuck her. HER CLIT. While you fuck her. Play with her clit.


I'm currently recovering from surgery — a shoulder injury, nothing serious, but I've been told recovery from this kind of surgery (repairing a torn rotator cuff) takes some time and that I'll be laid up for a while and even more useless than usual. So I'm taking a couple weeks off. That means lots of time — and lots of Netflix and Percocet — on the couch for me, but no new SLLOTDs for you. You'll get new columns and new podcasts but no new SLLOTDs. In lieu of new SLLOTDs we will be running previously published letters and my responses. In lieu of flowers or get-well cards please get yourself something nice at www.ImpeachTheMotherfuckerAlready.com — all proceeds benefit the ACLU, Planned Parenthood, and the International Refugee Assistance Project — or email me a picture of your boyfriend's butt.

Listen to my podcast, the Savage Lovecast, at www.savagelovecast.com.

Impeach the motherfucker already! Get your ITMFA buttons, t-shirts, hats and lapel pins and coffee mugs at www.ITMFA.org!

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