Televangelist Warlock Pat Robertson Casts Spell on Hurricane Florence

Comments

1

This is actually what their Old Testament is all about and I think these are the ones that actually practice most closely to how their god is portrayed. Read Genesis through Deuteronomy. Moses had a time and the priest are doing witchcraft all over the place to assuage Jehova's (petty) wrath and the Israelite's constant moaning down which pisses god off.

2

Well, he does invoke the name of Yeshua/Jesus at the beginning, so technically it's more of a very emphatic prayer, rather than an actual spell casting; not that it will make any difference either way, because no matter what happens or how many die or suffer, it's just "God's Will".

3

Well, Florence is curving south, then projected to swing north around Virginia, so maybe it is working?

4

If my orange voodoo poppet with the bad hair isn't producing an aneurysm, then I sure as hell don't expect Robertson's witchcraft to do a damn thing. I was here first, he needs to get to the back of the line.

5

Used to watch these guys (Falwell, Ernest Angley now 97) on Sunday mornings to get my chuckles in the 70s_80s when they took away Saturday morning cartoons. Well, he's still around. Hardly hold himself up but still there. Just as funny.
30 plus years ago he was pushing hurricanes off his coast to preserve his antennas and Sat dishes. Nothing new. He's still not giving up until he dies and the kids and family divide the booty he's acquired through generous detonators who have received his grace.

6

Detonators, Sorry about the typo....still

7

may we all be as grateful as this spiritualist when we get to 88.

if you're reading this and don't shout "twice as clean as mary margarine" you will decrease your life by 8.8; if you just did you will live to at least 88.

8

Bonkers!

9

I don't know what S. Carolina's worried about.

Didn't they Outlaw global warming/catastrophic climate change? Surely they can pray away the fray, too....

On a more Serious note, Good Luck, E.Coast!

And be NOT afraid to blame the Koch Bros LLC / Fossil Fools for this shit. Jesus (pretty damn sure it was Him) told me it's mostly Their Fault. So it IS.

10

At least he's not praying for it to wash the Gays away.

11

Caption correction: The line is, "Double, double toil and trouble; Fire burn, and cauldron bubble."

Billy Shakespeare wasn't about to rhyme "bubble" with itself!

12

I guess it won't help if I ask Rev. Grifter to pray for an Apple Cup win over UW.