Road trip to the next showing.

I love HUMP!, and have been 3 or 4 times. That said, it is both the least arousing and least pickupy sex-focused event I could imagine. I'm sure others will disagree on the first assertion, but I doubt many will on the second.

Agree @ 3...I truly enjoyed both of my HUMP experiences, but didn't find the atmosphere to be arousing. It had a fun vibe and was almost wholesome, in an odd way. Probably because all of the mystique surrounding "dirty" sex was gone (due to all of the sex positive people)... which is the point, I suppose. I feel like the average bar on 82nd ave is sleazier. Although what does that say about me if sleaze=arousal?

Tell your husband to buck up and go with a (non-sexy-time) friend.

Didn't know you NEEDED permission. What are you, 14?

I can be insensitive sometimes and I don't respond well to a partner telling me what I can and can't do so my first instinct would be to say something along the lines of fuck off, I'm going anyway. It's a movie screening, not a fuck fest. That said, there seem to be some deeper issues in this relationship. Cheating in a previous relationship does not mean someone will cheat in their current relationship. Possibly they have established some rules to keep boundaries in place if they are both worried about her behaving the same way again, but saying that you can't go watch movies with other people because of the content of the movie is taking it a bit far. They both need to step back and review why she feels she might cheat, the fact that he is being insecure and controlling, and that as it now stands, he has more power in the relationship because of her past that didn't involve him. As far as the extra ticket, yeah. Give it to a friend, a family member, or sell it.

Only the "All The Way Inside" level of pass includes spin-the-anatomically-correct-dragon-dildo. And real cheaters can always spring for the Chastity Ball option.

... you know what now that I say it, naked hamster-ball orgies would be kind of hot.

"I’m almost always down to fuck, and a total babe"
Who talks about themselves this way? (Also, who wouldn't have figured out they could go with a platonic pal?)
Nice letter from the HUMP marketing team. See #2, it worked.

Agreed with BiDanFan @8. I was reading this going "well, the husband's just being silly," until that line came out, now I'm like "is she saying that she totally would sneak someone a handy in the restroom if her husband wasn't there?"

Where are people getting that they're married? I got the sense that this was a far less, well, married relationship.

Oh I thought Sportlandia was answering the LW’s question and suggesting they go to a screening where her bf could attend. Fine idea I thought. But he meant he was heading off.. oh hum.
You sure that’s who wrote it Fan..
They trying to take us for mugs? And true, who writes about themselves as a total babe. There’s healthy self esteem and then there’s wanksville.

Her boyfriend sounds pretty insecure, but I can't imagine why.

Lava @11: Hmm, perhaps. I read comments 1 and 2 as being written in the same tone. Wasn't aware that HUMP went on tour. "Wanksville," ha ha! Love your turns of phrase.

@*: "Who talks about themselves this way?" Millennials? :-P

Anyway, agreed that HUMP is a red herring here. The issues are her SO's insecurity and possibly the entirely reasonable justification for them if THATHO is indeed looking to hook up with strangers whenever she goes out without her SO. If the latter is the case - if she's not using "I'm almost always down to fuck" to mean that she's interested in sex with a lot of people and may pursue it regardless of any agreements she's made with her partner and not simply to mean that she has a high sex drive (which doesn't necessarily mean anyone wants to or will fuck random strangers) - she should probably date people who don't consider sex with other people "cheating", since it doesn't sound like she'll be happy trying to follow a monogamous commitment. I'd also generally recommend not dating adults who think it's their place to "let" other agentic adults do something or not (unless there's an unmentioned consensual domination aspect to this?) - we can prefer and ask, but permission concerning what other people do with their own bodies is not ours to grant or withhold.

If the insecurity isn't justified because she's really not interested in cheating, she should go and let the SO react how he will, or dump him if this is part of a controlling pattern. Her past behavior may be relevant, but does anyone really want to be in a relationship where zir partner can't actually trust zir and tries to control what ze does and won't "let" zir go out to do things on zir own (again excluding the obvious consensual domination scenario)? If that's how this guy views her past and its ongoing implications, he's probably not the right partner for her - she can't erase what she's already done, so she's stuck trying to prove she won't cheat forever, possibly with no way she'll every actually be able to do so, which isn't a healthy dynamic.

THATHO, go or not as you please, don't cheat on your SO, and if you don't want monogamous relationships, don't agree to them. Also, if this is part of a controlling pattern of behavior on your SO's part where he dictates what you can and can't do and constantly makes you work to prove your affection, loyalty, etc. (especially with no clear way you can do so and be done constantly seeking approval), dump him.

Hump is great. But the films/bodies/scenes are so diverse, only a couple are likely to be arousing to any particular person. In all the times I've been, I've never seen any kind of pickup/sex-party scene. Audience basically looks and behaves much like any other young-skewing liberal urban audience. Tell your BF to get over it.

Thank you John @14. As soon as someone in a personal relationship tells me what to do, my back arches. Such a tactic of control.
If this LW is serious and not a fake, then she sounds like an unpleasant young woman and as this man has children, I think he should send her on her merry total babe way, and find himself a different sort of woman.
Close the door on your way out honey.

I think it would be quite difficult to meet some at HUMP and just fuck them right away. Like maybe more difficult than doing so at a Star Wars movie on opening night. It’s usually sold out, and as others have said, the vibe is really lighthearted and fun. Except there’s always one film that creeps me out and I close my eyes, and the sounds reassure me that I made the right choice. But that’s fun in its own way.

Bring a chaperone. Sounds like solid advice. And why are so many people hating on the LW? Maybe she really is a DTF babe. Don’t we like those?

It’s the overall letter which indicates, to me, a person with lots of vanity and very little empathy.
No issue with attractive young women who enjoy sex.

This letter is clumsy, I call fake and hope they picked some good HUMP films I won’t get to see.

I, too, had fun at Hump but wasn’t aroused by a majority of it and certainly never had sex or made out with anyone there. That said, clever on Dan to use it to sell another ticket.

So, here SO is concerned she will hump after HUMP? Like, HUMP was the only possible place she could cheat? They deserve one another...

So, her SO is concerned she will hump after HUMP? Like, HUMP was the only possible place she could cheat? They deserve one another...

and the Burning Man Festival is just about art, music and spiritualism. I know they aren't the same, but the festival lasts for 14 days (3 weekends). Hard to believe that his schedule with his kids would change that much (shortly before Thanksgiving), on such short notice, that he would be unavailable for the entire time. If I were the LW I would really want to know the why of the schedule change. If the explanation isn't credible, then her relationship probably some really serious issues.

I’m so grateful BiDanFan is always here to say exactly what I’m thinking. I’m only just catching up on the last couple weeks of Savage Love and between this LW calling herself a total babe who’s always down to fuck (and not being able to come up with the idea of bringing a friend to a film festival on her own), the person who suggested an 18-year-old get surgery so that his cock would curve the right way and hit his girlfriend’s G spot and the guy who wants gay folk to wear the confederate flag and fuck in the streets... I’m feeling pretty weird. Are these real? What is happening?