To See What I Have Seen, To See What I See!: Inside the HUMP! jury room.
"To See What I Have Seen, To See What I See!": Inside the HUMP! jury room.

The annual HUMP! film festival—featuring sexy 'n' hilarious five-minute dirty movies submitted by sex positive amateurs from around the Pacific Northwest and beyond—doesn't just appear out of nowhere. We get upwards of 100 submissions every year, and only accept around 20-25 of the best entries to be allowed in the festival. So you may be asking yourself, "WHO ARE THE LUCKY PEOPLE WHO GET PAID FOR WATCHING PORN ALL DAY AND DECIDE WHAT GETS INTO HUMP??"

That is a reasonable question. While the process is mired in secrecy—much like how a new Pope is selected—I can reveal the following as a former HUMP jurist. You get about 7-10 people in a room, all employees of either The Stranger and our sister paper The Mercury, along with festival originator/sex columnist Dan Savage, and then you watch 100+ porn videos for about 9 HOURS STRAIGHT.

Trust me when I say, it's a lot. In fact, after my stint as a HUMP jurist, I dreamed of being chased around by all manner of genitalia for an entire week. And you know those particularly... ummm... uncomfortable HUMP videos that are featured in the festival and make you feel like you'll never be able to scrub those images from your eyes? If you're on the HUMP jury, multiply that by 25.

So please take a moment to send your thoughts and prayers to the HUMP jurists for their service to this festival, and don't forget to get your tickets to HUMP! 2018 right here and right now! The most popular screenings are ALREADY selling out.