The Scent of a Woman Doused in Sap

Savage Love Letter of the Day





Fenugreek or fenugreek extract might serve and be less sticky. (Fenugreek is typical fake maple flavor.)


I hope this dude discovered the convenience of a bedside maple-syrup-scented candle.


Move to Riverdale.


could be worse. what if the writer's turn-on was sauerkraut?


Just move to Canada where everyone shares your affinity. Problem solved (but yeah it's fake).

If I recall correctly James Spader's character on Boston Legal had a maple syrup fetish.


It never ceases to amaze me some of the fakes that Dan falls for.


I don't think it counts as "falling for" if he explicitly acknowledges the possibility.


Does your dick need to be hard WHILE YOU ARE STILL AT IHOP?

Like, I've been on dates that I knew where pretenses for fucking. Even then, I didn't get my dick hard while sipping G&Ts, I waited until we got back home.

And if I had a maple syrup fetish? I'd be like "hell yeah I play with food lemme lick this off your nipples" and then drip-drip-drip. If you're worried about being outed as a bizarre freak (instead of garden variety semi-risque), back it up with some whip cream, honey, whatever foods seem normal.

Also, maple bacon is a thing, get your girl maple-bacon scented things, like candles, toothpastes, etc. They ARE out there. Your fetish can be completely realized.


Here you go:


Some fetishes are so weird but harmless that it's kind of adorable. I used to go out with a guy who had a fetish for watching balloons inflate. It did nothing for me, but it was such an easy thing to do and it made him happy. Real or fake, Maple Man is in good company.


A dab of maple flavoring behind his own ears should work fine. Or in his nostrils, for that matter.


Carpenter @12: somewhere out there is a woman who would really get off kissing a dude with syrup dribbling from his nostrils.


LW should join FetLife and list maple syrup as an interest. By way of example, others have listed:

dipping her in maple syrup and licking her
canadian maple syrup covered tits
Licking syrup off of tits in an IHOP bathroom
twatwaffles with butter and maple syrup
pouring scalding maple syrup on douchwaffles

And that's just the first page. I don't suppose they're all fake.


Twatwaffles? I love maple syrup.


I think I have a new favorite expletive. Oh, TWATWAFFLES!!!


If he did want to wean himself off though, surely the approach would be the same as for death grip? Eg no sniffing of maple for a long time, and eventually your body will need an orgasm even without it.


Yes, it would be fair. POA. Some people like cuddles beforehand. Some insist that their partners look them in the eyes and tell them 'I love you'. Twisted kinksters, eh. Out with the sticky. The sap also rises. The sap only rises. You almost certainly have a host of other winning qualities; and any genuine match will put up with a minor dollop (in all contexts, surely?--but in this context, of the libation of the tree).


@7. cmonster. What if it's not fake? Dan gave the right answer.


yes completely fake! cmon Dan you're not falling for this...


If this guy looks anything like Justin Trudeau he's got it made.


If he’s paying for the maple syrup, what’s the problem here.