You better update your LinkedIn, Fido.
You better update your LinkedIn, Fido. yanjf/Getty Images

U.S. Justice Department is threatening to sue our state: And why would they do that? Drumroll, please. They don’t like legislation Jay Inslee signed into law that would “help Hanford workers win more compensation claims for illnesses,” reports the Seattle Times. The Justice Department says that it discriminates against the federal government. Washington State Attorney General Bob Ferguson says he looks forward to defending the legislation.

More sea lions shot to death: We’re sick of having to report about bullet-ridden dead sea lions washing ashore. The total number of shot sea lions is now at 8. This is well into sea-lion serial killer territory. Look, regardless of anyone’s understanding or opinion of population control and marine biology, it is not up to ecological vigilantes to decide whether or not they can go shooting marine wildlife.

Warm rain is attacking our snow: We were having such a decent start to snow accumulation in the mountains this year, but all that is being set back by the dreaded warm rains. Those warm rains just sneak up on ya with no warning. One minute you're sitting there, frozen and fluffy, ready to be cut through by a sweet mountain shredder on their first ski run of the year, and the next, you're dripping and melting into the soil below. It's the same old sad song.

Rain coming for us lowlanders too: Whatever, I have a rain jacket. Unlike the snow I don't melt under pitiful rain.

Stoners are taking jobs away from hardworking dogs: ICYMI, 20 percent of police dogs could be facing “FORCED RETIREMENT” because of our legalized pot. It just ain’t right. These dogs could have families to support, retirements to save for, but now? Nothing.

A man died for trying to use a vending machine: This story is ludicrous and terrifying and ultimately really sad. A tattoo artist in Seattle has been charged with second-degree murder for allegedly clobbering another man from behind. The tattoo artist thought he was trying to steal from a vending machine. The victim was a resident of the building who seemed to be using the vending machine in an entirely normal fashion.

Mississippian who wants invitation to public hanging wins Senate seat: Cindy Hyde-Smith, who had to apologize for saying that if one of her supporters invited her to “a public hanging, I’d be on the front row,” won against her opponent Mike Espy in the Mississippi race for the Senate.

Time to celebrate, we’re getting a new cruise terminal! Woohoo! KIRO7 reports that “the Port of Seattle has approved a 5-year budget to expand its facilities,” the budget for which is set to the tune of $348 million. Oh, there is a part you might not like, which is that there is set to be a 3 percent hike in property taxes to raise approximately $74.2 million a year. But I mean, think of all the cruise choices there will be!

Trump adviser claims “no equivalency” to Hillary Clinton’s emails: Did I say Trump adviser? Because I meant Trump’s daughter, Ivanka. Oh wait, she’s both! That’s totally cool, right? Well, anyway, Ivanka was using her private email account for government business, and wants to be clear that “there really is no equivalency” between what she did, and what Hillary did. You’ll remember that Hillary’s use of a private email server got her chants of “lock her up” at Trump rallies. Let’s not forget also that Adviser Ivanka’s husband Jared the kushman Kushner also used his personal email for government business, last year.

Look! The UW finally made it: You know when CHEEZ-IT is using your school to advertise that you’ve hit the big time. If only this disgusting laxative-of-an-excuse-for-a-snack could have taken the time to work out typos from their promoted content (because I totally never have any typos). Yes CHEEZ-ITs are disgusting. But, you do want to be the "snack-MVP," right?

Wallingford Walkaround: Did you catch that glorious hour of sun yesterday? The one between the long bouts of yucky, grey, raining weather? I hope so! I was able to get out on a dog walk just as the sun poked out from the clouds. We went around checking out wall-art in Wallingford. This first wall is a hidden gem on one of the many residential blocks in Wallyhood.

Michael Bell

This second wall is by Essential Baking Co, where Pika and I stopped to pick up an almond croissant, as I hadn't eaten anything yet. She was not thrilled with my suggestion that she resembled the funny creature on the wall.

Do my teeth stick out like that?
Do my teeth stick out like that? Michael Bell

And finally, I love the art on the side of evo, the store attached to All Together skatepark (one of the few places we can skate on a rainy day), but Pika was getting bored of posing for photos and gave me this extraordinary yawn.

Gouda never seems to get bored of a photoshoot...
Gouda never seems to get bored of a photoshoot... Michael Bell

Tonight's best Seattle entertainment options include: The Short Circuit Pacific Rim Film Festival, a reading with Fear: Trump in the White House author Bob Woodward, and the chance to see a series of self-portrait collages by Clotilde Jiménez.