We are very online here.
We are very online here. SrdjanPav/Getty Images

Three school lockdowns because of gun: There were reports of a gun on Issaquah High School’s campus. Three schools locked down in response. A 14-year-old boy was taken into custody. No firearm was found.

Amazon Go is on the up-and-up: The stores are multiplying. They may even start taking root in airports. That market of literally on-the-go shoppers could be a good one to tap. Experts told the Seattle Times that, without employees, Amazon could set their prices lower than other airport stores. That would increase competition and honestly be probably good for the consumer. A Dasani water bottle for $6? Shove it up your ass, N Terminal. (Disclaimer: I don't know how much Dasani water bottles cost in the N Terminal, but how far off can I be?)

Allen Institute sets sights on immunology: The goal is to cure cancer. The means? Through the immune system. The Allen Institute, with a $125 million donation from its founder, Paul Allen, will focus on five different cancers and how the immune system can be manipulated to fight them. Unfortunately, there's a lot left to learn about the immune system. So, there's a lot of work to be done! Onward, then!

Natural gas is pretty bad, it turns out: There are two planned natural gas facilities in Washington state. They're advertised as a solution to climate change 'cause gas is cleaner than coal right? No. You're wrong. Methane makes up most of natural gas and methane is a huge bummer. It also leaks out into the atmosphere at alarming rates that aren't recorded in official reports.

Imperceptibly, Washington has some of the fastest broadband Internet speeds in the country: If that's the case, then I can't imagine what the people in Maine (the slowest state for broadband) are going through. We're ninth. Yay. Ninth. The U.S. sucks in comparison to the global scale.

Oh God, an NBA team, too? The owner of the Phoenix Suns is holding his franchise hostage because he wants a brand new arena. He's threatening to maybe move the Suns—yes, the Suns—to Seattle of all places. Leave us be! Or give us a more appropriately named team!

Look at that weather: Apparently, a radar went down on the coast so we're in the dark for a little while. I guess that means you'll have to open a window.


I suppose this is actual winter: Climate change will destroy us soon enough, right?


Michael Cohen is getting locked up: Three years is a pretty minor sentence for "covering up [Trump's] dirty deeds." But, hey, we'll take it. Cohen was charged for his role in using hush-money to buy the silence of two women, for lying before Congress, and for being a general shit-bag deception and “motivated by personal greed and ambition," according to the New York Times.

Theresa May is, somehow, still in power: She's hanging on by a thread! May, the United Kingdom's embattled Prime Minister, was supported by 200 Conservative lawmakers. Still, 117 voted against her. May will have to make this Brexit thing happen soon, but, with that kind of opposition, who knows what will happen.

Headline of the week:


More immigrants on the Trump chopping block—this time? Vietnam refugees: Ah, the Vietnam War, the conflict the U.S. definitely lost and destroyed a whole country in the process. The Vietnamese people who came to the U.S. seeking refuge during the war, and who have lived here SINCE THE VIETNAM WAR, may be deported if the White House gets its way.