You can take that shit to the bank
You can take that shit to the bank OTTO GREULE JR/GETTY IMAGES

Russell Wilson is now the highest paid player in the NFL: He’s also now the highest paid player in NFL history. Hell yes Russell, get that money. The Super Bowl-winning quarterback came to a final agreement with Seahawks officials late last night and signed a four year, $140 million contract extension. He also received a $65 million signing bonus, bringing his average annual salary to a record-breaking $31.4 million. And here I am getting excited about a couple hundred bucks on my tax return.

On the Boards presents NW New Works 2019, a festival of the boldest new performance in the PNW!

Amazon donates $200,000 to local PAC for wide open city council race: This is one of the most contentious and crowded city council races in recent history with almost every seat up for grabs, and Amazon wants to make sure the right butts end up in those seats. They gave six figures to the Civic Alliance for a Sound Economy (CASE), which they’ve donated to several times before in local election years. A $365,000 check from Amazon in 2017 helped CASE successfully pour money into ads for now-Mayor Jenny Durkan.

Microsoft pledges to operate data centers on 75% renewable energy by 2023: They’re already using 50% renewables at these centers and plan to go fully renewable by 2029. Microsoft uses a lot of energy, but they’ve become a global leader in responsible energy policy including working with Puget Sound Energy to operate their Redmond-based headquarters on 80% renewable energy and implementing an internal carbon tax on their own emissions. See Trump, wind power isn’t so crazy after all.

The U.S. Postal Service launches National Dog Bite Prevention Week: Apparently it’s a huge problem and not just something they show on cartoons. Almost 6,000 postal workers were attacked by dogs in 2018, which is a whole lot more than I expected. Seattle ranks 22nd for most dog bites with 27 and Houston takes the top prize with a whopping 75 attacks last year. So if you want your mail carrier to feel safe, maybe don’t answer the door with your dog, no matter how cute your pup is. There’s something about that uniform that just sets them off.

Fans have already pledged $339 million to rebuild Notre Dame: Take that Russell Wilson! French President Emmanuel Macron said that they would rebuild the church to its former glory. The good news is much of the church is still intact, but it could be several years before we see another steeple rise above this iconic French landmark. A large group of philanthropists, businesses, and normal people have already pledged money to the project. In the meantime, and I mean this with all due respect, can we please get a drone shot slowly ascending from inside the church up through the now burnt out roof?

Mostly dry today: Also we didn’t break that record I was talking about yesterday. Sad!

Ilhan Omar sees a spike in death threats following Trump attacks: Many of these death threats specifically reference the video that Trump pinned to the top of his twitter feed. I’m not going to post it here because it’s fucking gross, but you can go find it if you want to. It contrasts a line from Omar’s speech at a Muslim advocacy group with graphic scenes of the World Trade Center on 9/11. One of these death threats came from a man on Facebook who had been posting anti-Muslim hate speech for years without any pushback from the tech platform, until The Guardian stepped in.

Now listen here you $#!%: Like I said yesterday, I am a closeted Les Misérables superfan. I had the recordings on my iPod Nano as a teenager (yes, we're talking way back) and can still probably sing most of it from memory. It's the gripping tale of a French guy released from jail who ends up with a lady's kid and accidentally joins a doomed revolution. Here's one of my favorite songs to start your morning:

Send me your mugs: Tomorrow is the day people! Last week we (The Stranger staff) showed you our mugs now it's time to show us yours. Do you have a mug leftover from that time you worked on the Al Gore campaign? We want to see it. Have an impossibly large mug that's probably more of a bowl? Show us! Have a mug with one of those little ceramic animals hiding in the bottom? We need to see that shit. You can send any and all mug shots to or tweet them at me at @timothyfkenney."

Tonight's best Seattle entertainment options include: A music-focused poetry reading with Hanif Abdurraqib, a concert with hiphop innovators Eric B. & Rakim, and the final round of the Outstanding: Queer Comic Competition.