“Local Stranger Commentor Would Do Anything For Internet Points Except Believe Things That Are Unpopular”

Everyone knows that wingers and christians don't and can't do comedy. What is funny to them is cruelty. Just out of the hat, I dare you to get Sr. Shoreline to tell you a joke or turn you onto a comedian you might like. Satire is a completely different language to the right. They write the shit themselves.

Maybe the rubes on the right don't get it that right-wing satire isn't serious because it is rarely funny? Also a lot of the serious things they do believe in, like the QAnon business, sure seems like satire. Very confusing!

Is it possible to funny and an intersectional feminist?

What is the difference between a glorious and noble knight heading South to stab the living shit out of a baby alligator and a conquistador stabbing the living shit out of a male cow?

Baby alligators don’t chase red.

;[

@3
Sr. Shoreline is sounding more and more like a parrot, or maybe a robot, these days.

@5:

I'm guessing you're too terrified of them to ask in-person...

@8 I would ask but I can't stop giggling when I see them with their weed whacker haircuts dyed with toilet bowl cleaner.

Do they go to all that effort to look that unattractive as a joke that I'm not getting?

The reality is a lot of the right-wing sites that use "satire" in their disclaimers are intentionally spreading disinformation for clicks because they know a right-wing audience will believe some of it or at least get riled up over it. It was only a matter of time before Snopes stumbled upon an unfunny site that really does think it's satire. I'm not going to get mad at Snopes because in going over hundreds of bullshit sites the right has produced they actually stumbled upon a sincere one.

9: I can guarantee from your posts that you're dumber looking. Somehow I just know.

Instead of simply not doing what girls do they automagically transform into boys, 9.

They’re ruled by what other people think and what they’re “supposed to do”, which means they have to go hang out in an anti-cocoon, or something.

@9:

It makes complete sense you would assume the #1 job of every lesbian is to make themselves as attractive as possible to charmers such as yourself. I mean, who knows? A "special evening" with the likes of you at a classy joint such as The Olive Garden or Red Lobster and they just might change teams, amiright?

12: In group or out group, everyone conforms to one style or another. It's one of the bases of culture, mainstream or otherwise. Criticizing a group for taking on a certain look to identify each other as part of that group is some low-ass-hanging fruit. I know people love to fashion themselves as idiosyncratic nonconformists living outside the box, but nearly everyone adopts the signifiers of their chosen group or subculture. And so fucking what? Do the right-wing trolls on this site have some kind of elite high fashion that we're not aware? Whatever's on the rack at Wal-mart?

Costco, I’d venture.

@13 So all those purple headed humorless intersectional social justice warriors are lesbians? Well that explains a lot, thanks!

How many intersectional feminist does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

That’s not funny.

@16:

Well, they are about five seconds after meeting you...

"they are about five seconds after meeting you..."

So lesbians are not born that way, they're made. Gotcha Mr. Progressive! I hear the same thing happens in the Navy.

What I learned from Comte cheese today:

Women with hair dyed by toilet bowl cleaner and cut with weed whackers are all lesbians.
Lesbians choose lesbianism.

The face of modern progressivism.

@16 you sound like you are 5'6" and smell terrible but don't worry there is someone out there for you. You just need to chill out a bit and stop asking for feet pics and I promise you will find someone.

@21 Yes, but I identify as 6ft 2 inches, with well toned abs and I smell like a summer beach house in Tofino. You deny that, it's violence.

@19:

Only after meeting you and your imaginary army of sock puppets. Born lesbians wouldn't give you the time of day - any other woman would simply claim to be a lesbian in your presence in order to have a convenient excuse to no have to endure your insufferably toxic masculinity.

@23 Well, that's not very funny. Intersectional feminist are you?

Really, I find the Bee very funny. And though written from a conservative viewpoint they do not hesitate to skewer Christians and conservatives as well. Agree, though, Snopes might as well fact-check the stories for those who wonder what portions of the story are real and what satire.

Leftists hate to be mocked.... so let's mock them:

L, G, T, Q, And + Publicly Execute B For Implying There Are Only Two Genders

Experts Warn We Have Only 12 Years Left Until They Change The Timeline On Global Warming Again

Disaster At Seesaw Art Installation As Obese American Children Catapult Mexicans Over The Border

Woke Polar Bear Apologizes For Being White

Mario Lopez Criticized For Saying It's 'Dangerous' To Let Children Play With Sharp Knives

Promising New Prospect Lebronna James Expected To Dominate WNBA

Some people and/or groups are just good at some things and suck at others.

Conservatives are good at talk radio and suck at comedy. Liberals suck at talk radio and are good at comedy.

Stick with your strengths.

The problem is a lot of people don’t know what written satire is, they just think there’s the onion and then theirs news. I’ve had friends who have posted the borowitz report articles with the caption of “omg I can’t believe this it true, seems like something i’d find in the onion”

@27:

Nobody's paying attention - they're all at the buffet hoping the salmon mousse puts them out of their misery...

Another "out of the hat" I just thought of but could a christian "comedian" ever pull off something like Monty Python's "The Life of Brian"? I went to a few screenings at churches over the years of those "Left behind" movies. Those were a hoot. I laughed my ass off the entire time. Not to be obnoxious but I just couldn't believe people around me were enthralled with that shit. Not even cinematics or the writing and acting here am I talking about. The right wing and their attendant evangelicals have to realize they are idiots some time and at some point. Fuck, we're not gonna do anything to them other than point out the fools they are. And somehow pointing out shit that is idiotic is what makes the left "elitist". You got me.

@28, 4 Except the Bee often is. I suspect the reason it is is that it’s willing to face up to a lot that’s ridiculous on the right and amongst evangelicals as well as skewering the left.

There’s an easy solution for Snopes here, one I’m surprised they haven’t taken. Write a single article that covers everything the Bee posts. It’s all satire, just like the Bee itself says. Any other questions come in, link to that. Done.

@16. Well the reason that intersectional feminists look the way they do is because they are intentionally trying to make themselves like clowns, since they have nothing to offer in the humour department. Slapstick is the only thing their good at. So rather than making people laugh with them, they are making them laugh at them. But at least people are laughing. :)

And they are lesbians because no men want them. Except of course the balless cucks with no testosterone. But those people are not men. :)

@34 I’m thinking of opening an intersectional feminist hair dressers and calling it, “Making A Bad Situation Worse”.

We’ll have a whole range of toilet bowl cleaners to dye hair with and a crew of undocumented Mexicans with weed whackers to cut the hair.

@35 Hahahahahahaha. Well at least you won't have to pay illegals a ridiculous $15 an hour. :). But they don't contribute anything in taxes anyway so that evens out.

Also that would make a good meme! :). And an opportunity for the left to learn how to meme, because they know fuck all about that.

So you’re going to bitch about taxes but won’t put them on your payroll.

How New York of you.

@35. Someone might open "Prophet Mohammad's Wedding Cake Bakery" with "no gay weddings" policy and a "50% off children wedding cakes". Lolololol.

P.s. let's see how fast this one gets flagged. Because we can joke about jesus all day long but Mohammad!!!!???? Lolol.

@37. Is that better than wanting socialist policies, more taxes, campaigning for $15 minimum wage, but then cutting his employees hours as soon as they want a wage increase, and all of a sudden believing in "free market" as soon as it comes to your money? (Looking at you Bernie Sanders). You tell me.

Don’t know or care. I know I get to care about the payroll tax twice, and I know that, weed whacker or not, if you’re working in a brick-and-mortar location in the city you’re paying in.

I had never heard of the Bee before this slog post.

I probably won’t hear anything about the Bee ever again.

It’s pretty inconsequential.

It's hilarious how the right wingers prove the point. Sigh.

What's the difference between Christian comedian and Muslim comedian? Christian comedian blows; Muslim comedian BLOWS UP. Lol

A timely joke, what with the world watching the day-to-day numbers inching ever closer to those of a war zone in the Middle East.

LOL.

The "rejection letter from KKK" article gave me a chuckle.

It occurs to me that BB might be taking a swipe at Snopes purely because it makes for some Internet drama, which might raise their profile a bit. Not unlike a political debate, where the ones polling lowest go after the front-runner the hardest because they need to distinguish themselves and draw the spotlight their way.

Alright, that "KKK Rejection Letter" piece made me laugh out loud. Funny is funny, unless you do not personally have a sense of humor.

E Michael Jones is pretty funny, as is Norm Macdonald.

Also extremely funny: the Stranger's coverage of the second DP debate, i.e. a single piece, also by the author of this one.
"If you can't say something bad about that person, say nothing."