Dating Older Women, Being Content Single, and Doubled-Ended Dildos — Reader Advice Roundup

Comments

1

A double is fine for some things, but I think a Feeldoe will work better for pegging. Better angle, and much closer to the behavior of a strap-on.

2

Fuck older ladies

3

I'd read that book of adventures in Spain (o:

4

An "outie vagina" is a startling mental image.

I had to Google pictures and an "outie vagina" turns out to be a totally normal vulva. They look like the vast majority I've seen, both in real life and.. ahem... art.

5

50% of them are "outie vaginas", according to Dr. Jen Gunter, author of the just released The Vagina Bible, which the caller might want to get their hands on.
There are cultures where it's considered a mark of beauty or thought to enhance sexual pleasure for the labia haver so people stretch theirs on purpose to try to make them longer. I guess nowhere can escape beauty standards.

6

@4 barna the only labia/clit art I've seen was from Pacific Islanders, you can imagine the absolute joy I felt walking around that exhibit. You don't know you're missing something your whole life until you see it in person. Strongly gender eglatarian culture apparently, then and now.

7

@barna I was trying to find an image, but my favorite were the door lintels of a woman with spread legs and prominent clit that would go over her brother's doorway so that she could grant him the grace of her rank and protection as on his own he had none.

8

I don’t particularly like the guy who likes older women any more than someone who only dates younger women (and I’m an older woman). The comment about older women having their heads screwed on better because they’ve made a place for themselves in the working world... it came off like blaming women for the discrimination they face in the working world. Um yes it is actually challenging.

Also, a LOT of older women struggle in the workplace due to ageism on top of sexism, but it sounds like he’s not interested in them. He’s looking for a sugar mama.

Maybe guys like this are why TOWNY’s friends are skeptical?

9

Here's a very thorough review of 4 popular double dildos by sex toy reviewer Epiphora:
https://heyepiphora.com/2017/03/why-i-dont-like-strapless-strap-on-dildos/

Her bottom line: It's really difficult to find a double dildo to suit both people's needs. Better to let the receiver pick the dildo that works best for them, and invest in a good harness.

11

If a woman’s vagina is an outie, something is seriously wrong and she needs to get to the Dr pronto.
If they are meaning the vulva / labia/ clit, then say those words. And yes Virginia, each one is different and unique and beautiful.

12

Fresh @8, eh, I'm 48 and I wanted to high-five this LW. These are precisely the advantages I see myself as offering over women in their 20s and 30s. "They have made a place for themselves in the working world, etc" applies to people of all genders who've put a couple of decades into their careers -- isn't this why younger women date older men? Finding financial stability a good thing in a partner is not "looking for a sugar daddy/mama." I'm sorry about whatever happened to you that's caused you to read sexism into this lovely, positive post.

Lava @11, I agree. Let's not co-opt navel vocabulary for vulvas. One can have larger or smaller labia just as one can have a larger or smaller penis. Personally, I think large labia are hot, like ripe succulent fruits. Don't be ashamed of your labia, ladies!

13

For anyone wondering about their (or someone else's) vulva, I highly recommend Laura Dodsworth's wonderful BBC film 100 Vaginas. https://www.imdb.com/title/tt9435400

14

@ 6: I'm a New Zealander. We have a decent-sized population of Pacific Islanders, and unfortunately they don't have egalitarian cultures at all. The missionaries did a good job on brainwashing them, and two hundred years later it's still in full force. As a group, they are generally conservative, with very old-fashioned gender roles, and homophobic. They were the largest group to complain when gay marriage came into law.

15

@14 There's reasons why we did that to everyone who we tried to destroy. Can still respect the culture when that art came from. Same here in the US, a lot of the pioneer women who were taken by Native American tribes refused to go back to the Brits/whoever bc they were treated as people there and there was a definite problem with w runaway women as a result. Our failure to fully copy the Iroquois government structure and make our Supreme Court mandatory 100% female has had some repercussions too, one could safely say. It's impossible to imagine how much better off this country would be if they had actually hired Native American women to make up the fully empowered Court for the past 200+ years.

16

@14 I also don't begrudge any people the survival tactics they had to engage in to survive us, or the generational repercussions thereof.

I also think it's like religion.