One musician for each key on a piano. Coincidence? Or something else?

@2 Many verbs were used: "leaping" "jumper" "fell"
It's unclear.

Fuckin' Joe Biden. What a good. I could go for a Fig Newton though.

@5 What a goof, I meant

Biden's passing up tons and tens of Million$ in Free Airtime
some may call that a Strategy but it's seems to me
more like majorly-Missed Opportunity.

This is best we have?

Sad.
Stay innit, Bernie.
A lot can happen in a very short time.

And fuck off Switfy.
Whatever you're gonna troll.

@7 Your sad devotion to Bernie Sanders is really quite pathetic. Even if Joe Biden died tomorrow, Bernie Sanders will never be president.

No, nott HIM
switfy
US.

Our phony 'healthcare' system is a compleat Mess
In the Middle of a Fucking PANDEMIC, no less
If a few of the undeserving get something Free
is it Truly gonna upset your Apple Cart switfy?

Is anybody,, other than other media, really watching Trump's briefings?.

I quit watching after the second one because I live in the real world not some Trumpian fantasyland that exists only in his addled brain and the addled brains of his syncophants who desperately want/need White House jobs.

I just read only what Dr. Fauci said afterwards and remain confident I'm fully informed about what really matters..

I'm amused that even our local Sinclair ABC affiliate is no longer carrying the briefings. They just tell you to go to their Web site to watch it live streaming.

Congratulations on your upcoming baby giant panda, Ocean Park Zoo!
Indeed, a little privacy goes a long way.

Ohhh...ohhh...ohhh..ohhh.....a person fell off the Pike overpass or was pushed and hit by cars on I-5?! Either way, how tragic. My heartfelt condolences to those who knew the person.

@11 kristofarian: Although I believe Swifty is already dying of MAGAvirus, I love your poem.
Keep up the good work, kris! :)
@12 Purris: Thank you for the updates, but I gave up TV and ever listening to what senseless drivel comes spilling out of Trumpty Dumpty's filthy, putrid bottomless hole. I make a point to avoid Twitter, as well.

Everyone stay healthy safe, and sane.

Seattle Symphony furloughs 88 musicians. Very sad about the current ban on live performances. Will the Seattle Symphony offer streamable concerts? Are they already doing it?

WTF Wisconsin??

Panda Fucking

That's the name of my industrial-emo mashup band, btw.

Holy shit, I'm 46 and have never been able to whistle and thought I never would! (and have honestly never really much cared, though I still attempt to do so every once in a while just to confirm I still can't, for whatever reason.) Any tips, Chase?

Also, I've never blown a bubble gum bubble. It's always felt odd, the mundane crap I can't do. And then I ALSO have an old friend from high school who couldn't snap his fingers. Pennsylvanians, maybe.

I'm not religious (well, ok, except for the Church of the SubGenius...Praise Bob!!!) — but Milan's il Duomo Cathedral is spectacularly-stunning. It took 600 years to build, so imagine the social transfer of crafts like stonemasonry, stained glass, etc... down many generations from fathers to sons. And it recently took 10 years just to chemically clean the outside of the church!

Australia's Cardinal George Pell was just cleared of child molestation charges today too, by the Australian High Court. I look forward to looking for Dan's article raging about it tomorrow.

@12: Because every time Donald Trump goes off the rails it's an ad for Joe Biden. There's value in having everything he does documented for the world to see, as with every POTUS. So Joe Scarboro and the other stupid libs who think thought control and blackouts are the answer are simply snatching defeat from the jaws of victory come November.

Each one of Donald tirades and bad behavior becomes material for your friends such as The Young Turks and other lefty outlets to trash Donald Trump on YouTube and Twitter. I'm sure you don't have a problem with that.

Otherwise, the impression could build that Donald has it all under control.

Why don't the journalists start acting up?
Get rude, get in his face.
He's supposed to be a New York tough guy, presumably he can handle it.
After all, he has already abandoned all of the decorum crap. Give it back to him. When he calls you a third-rate reporter, call him a third-rate President.

Dicktaters gotta OWN the Media
And our Fascists LOVE them some Dicktaters.

@21 because the media are a bunch of Ivy League fancy boys (and girls). They have no training dealing with psychotic morons. Get one of these entertainment/sports reporters that went to state school or Spud Goodman to interview him.

@21: That would only feed into Trump's (and really, the larger GOP's) persecution narrative. Especially since Trump is actually a coward with no ability to handle confrontation. He would just get quiet, pretend the exchange never happened, and call on someone with a track record of friendly questions (OAN, FOX, fucking NAMBLA for all I know), or immediately end the press conference. Then the unhinged conservative sources would make hay of it for months.

@24,

Exactly. He actually fields difficult questions fairly regularly. He just doesn't answer them and instead goes off on unhinged, childish tirades. Here he is when asked about the disbanding of the Pandemic Response Team. It's so frustratingly stupid and sad.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W8Py8qaAV4M