King Cnut set his throne up on the beach and commanded the tide not to rise.
King Trump can command the churches to be open by Easter and the schools to be open in the fall but it is kind of out of his control and frankly it just makes him look silly.

@2 -- and it'll be Beautiful
and it'll be Powerful, too.

“It’s clear that our nation's schools must fully reopen and fully operate this school year.”

“Anything short of that robs students, not to mention taxpayers, of their future…”

--Cruella de Vil aka (billionairess) Batty DeVos beloved sister of Eric Prince of Blackwater (not the Doobie Bros song) infamy.

So, why not get them all Sick and just see what happens?

I mean, c’mon – what the Worst that could happen? A few Millions dead and countless others maimed/scarred for Life?

Hey, that could be their Future.

Life’s just not Fair, okay? Some gotta Sacrifice, do THEIR Part, for this Fake “prez.” There’s a fucking Election coming up, and quick. And the Libs are all fascists, don’t forget that either.

“I'm sure the young GOPers will still attend [the RNC] and make out with each other to own the libs.” There won’t be any Pleasure innit; it’s merely a game. Libs are so f’ing Easy!

Check out this dyn-o-mite Tom Tomorrow 'toon over at the Nib:
featuring this week: A Special Pandemic Fun Game -- Spot the Mistakes: We've inserted several deliberate errors throughout the following [4] panels. Can you find them all? Answers at the end -- but No Peeking!

https://thenib.com/author/tom-tomorrow/

I thought for sure the coin piece was gonna be an insanely long overdue call to finally cease manufacture of the infuriatingly worthless penny. Honestly, we could probably even consider extending it to the nickel, though I understand baby steps and shit. Here's a quick (10 minutes) and worthwhile Last Week Tonight segment on the environmental and economic disaster that is the stupid, modern penny.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_tyszHg96KI

And honestly this is something even fucking Trump could propose as a sensible bi-partisan measure that'd earn him some small amount of approval amongst the left without pissing off his shit-brained base. It'd even be an economic win, should he need to frame it as such.

mike blob @4, I'm all for getting rid of the penny, but for Trump to propose that as some sort of economic win at this stage in the dumpster fire that is his presidency--well, I would describe that as "penny-wise and pound-foolish."

Freudian slip alert. Instead of typing "I'm all for getting rid of the penny" above, I started typing "I'm all for getting rid of the presidency."

Anyway, I really wanted to comment here just to express my admiration for what badasses the Aussies have been with the coronavirus. They seem to be the one nation whose delusions most resemble Americans' delusions, and yet their response, unlike ours, has been thoroughly reality-based. I was reading about how prior to shutting down all of Melbourne they locked down a few public-housing buildings that were becoming disease vectors.

Just imagine the uproar if we tried to do that here. Actually, I can't imagine because we wouldn't have tried.

You'd think the right would be all over this in not supporting it. They're the original homeschool nuts. One would think this would appear to be a miracle which they teach of in AP creation biology.

If anyone noticed, Mary Kay Letourneau died. Oh for the days when that kind of shit was a big fucking deal.

@6:

Oh, they probably were all over it - right up to the point where, weeks into the pandemic they came to the sudden realization that they would have to spend several months locked up with their "little angels". Now, they can't get them out of the house fast enough...

Shorter @8 - 10:

"What's a few hundred thousand or millions dead - they're just old people that nobody cares about anyway. So, suck it up libtards and stop thinking about yourselves for two seconds cuz - I NEED MAH CHEEZEBERDERZ!"

Fuck it, everyone round up for charity, if you cant spare the 76 cents take a look at your life and why you are eating out. Cue the angry shut-ins mumbling some shit about socialism.

Governor Jay must wish his cousin had been Deputy Silent Bob.

If I were of a conspiracy minded bent, I might think that all this to-do over cash is to discourage its use and encourage people to switch to other, more traceable forms of payment.

The one thing that cash does is ensure privacy of transactions. Combined with EARN-IT, we'd be looking at a serious erosion of privacy.