Mr. President, lose my number.
"Mr. President, lose my number." Stefani Reynolds/Getty
Supreme Court rejects long-shot Texas lawsuit to overturn election results: The state of Texas filed a lawsuit against Georgia, Michigan, Pennsylvania, and Wisconsin, saying changes made to election procedures due to the pandemic were unlawful. Trump and over 100 elected Republican doofuses backed this unsubstantiated claim, which the court wanted no part in. This is the second time this week the Supreme Court shut down Trump and the GOP's attempts at bypassing democracy.

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Loren Culp continues his victim charade: By suing Washington Secretary of State Kim Wyman and the state of Washington for allegedly violating his civil rights during the 2020 gubernatorial election. According to KOMO, the lawsuit says Wyman "allowed illegal ballots to be distributed and counted" during the election, which disenfranchised legal voters. There is no evidence to support these claims. As of publishing, Wyman has yet to respond to the mini-Trump's lawsuit.

FKA twigs sues Shia LaBeouf: In a lawsuit that says the singer suffered "relentless abuse," including sexual battery, assault, and infliction of emotional distress in the hands of LaBeouf. In an interview with the New York Times, FKA twigs said that in coming forward she hoped to show how "even a critically acclaimed artist with money, a home, and a strong network of supporters" could get caught in a cycle of abuse. LaBeouf has called her allegations "not true," but he has a documented history of abuse toward several of his past girlfriends.

The White House told the FDA chief to either authorize Pfizer-BioNTech vaccine on Friday or resign: The ultimatum came from Trump's Chief of Staff Mark Meadows, who ordered FDA commissioner Stephen Hahn to move the vaccine authorization from Saturday morning to Friday end of day. This threat came as Trump sent tweets lambasting the FDA for being "a big, old, slow turtle" in its handling of the vaccines. Hahn denied Meadows threatened his job, saying that the FDA is "committed to issuing this authorization quickly."

That being said: The FDA is expected to issue an emergency use authorization for the Pfizer vaccine tonight.

Washington is getting ready to start vaccinating people: According to the Seattle Times, the state has submitted a list of 17 sites to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention where the 32,000 vials could be sent next week. Distributed among 13 counties, high-risk healthcare workers in hospitals will be inoculated first. Because the quantity is so limited, Washington's Department of Health is asking hospitals to use their judgment when doling out the vaccine. Most long-term care facilities won't get vaccines until later this month or early next year.

2020 won't stop being weird: After 51 years, an international team of codebreakers has cracked the Zodiac Killer's 340-character cipher, which was mailed to The San Francisco Chronicle in 1969. The FBI has verified David Oranchak, Sam Blake, and Jarl Van Eycke's claim of having broken the code, reports the New York Times. The message from the still-unknown killer is predictably creepy as hell:

Only read this blurb if you have a car: I-90 between Seattle and Mercer Island is shutting down the eastbound lane on Saturday night from 11:30 pm to 7:30 am on Sunday.

The Biden administration is shaping up to be Obama Part 3: The President-elect has chosen Susan Rice as director of the White House Domestic Policy Council. Rice served as Obama's national security adviser and UN ambassador. Biden also nominated Denis McDonough—Obama's White House chief of staff—as secretary of the Department of Veterans Affairs despite having never served in the armed forces.

Fauci says he'll get vaccinated publicly: The top infectious disease expert told the New York Times he intends to "get vaccinated publicly, in the public space, so that people can see me getting vaccinated" as soon as it's made available to him.

Sorry to keep hitting you with COVID-19 news: It's just that the whole thing has got me depressed. Do you think people will listen to Canadian commercials and forgo Christmas this year?

Populuxe Brewing in Ballard to close for good: The brewery just couldn't hack the pandemic and couldn't afford to stay open under the current COVID restrictions. Owners Peter Charbonnier and Amy Besunder told MyBallard they did everything they could to stay afloat—negotiating with their landlord, advocating for small business financial relief, grant and loan applications—but it wasn't enough. Populuxe will close for good on December 23 and will sell beer and merch at a discount until then.

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Post-Brexit trade deal looking unlikely by Sunday: After months of talks, the United Kingdom and European Union have yet to reach an agreement over trade—some of the main sticking points include fishing right and business competition rules, reports the BBC. If a trade deal isn't reached and ratified by December 31, the UK and EU could impose tariffs on each other's goods, leading to high prices.

A measure to create two new Smithsonian museums dedicated to women and Latinos failed to pass the Senate: You can thank this lone rogue Republican asshole for that.

For all you Swifties out there: I know y'all are eating because Ms. Taylor dropped not one but two whole albums this year. Her music makes my ears bleed, but here's Associate Editor and professed Taylor Swift fan Rich Smith's thoughts on her recently released album, evermore:

Last night I got a little stoned and listened to the whole thing once. The songs don’t start getting good until track nine, and even then the only really good tracks are “long story short” and “evermore (feat. Bon Iver).” I do not want to belabor this final point, but a Taylor Swift song featuring The National called “coney island” is neoliberalism.