Ah, the fresh taste of menthol. Like licking an ass that just sat in toothpaste
Ah, the fresh taste of menthol. Like licking an ass that just sat in toothpaste dmf87 / Getty Images

Joe Biden did a speech. His first State of the Union was last night. No big surprises; he repeated campaign pledges about expanding child care, education, infrastructure, etc etc. He also pointed out that it’s the first time that both figures sitting behind the president for one of these were both women, and he pledged to “root out systemic racism” in America. Afterwards, South Carolina Senator Tim Scott said that “America is not a racist nation.” Scott is the only Black Republican in the Senate.


Coronavirus numbers in India are still devastating. Over three thousand deaths in the last day, with an average of 350,000 new infections every day. Starting Sunday, everyone 18 and older will be eligible for vaccinations, but there aren’t nearly enough to go around.


Menthol cigarettes could be going away. The FDA is looking into a menthol ban. Anti-smoking groups say that menthol cigarettes are disproportionately used by youth and minority groups. The tobacco industry says this will have “unintended consequences,” which I suppose is one way to describe making less money off of people dying.

Five are dead following a mass shooting. What started as a welfare check in North Carolina ended with two cops dead, a suspect, and the suspect’s parents. Details are still a bit sketchy about who killed whom. It’s the eighth mass shooting in the US this week.

The My Pillow guy still talks to Trump all the time. "I've talked to him once every ... maybe month or so, if I'm down there," says Mike Lindell. Down where? He didn’t say, so take it as a dirty euphemism if you want. Topics of conversation reportedly include foreigners sneaking into the US. Ugh. How do we know all this? Because Lindell was a guest on Jimmy Kimmel’s show last night, just in case you were wondering about the kind of company Kimmel’s keeping these days.

Seattle continues to dominate at Jeopardy! Leah Caglio is the latest local to acquit herself admirably on the show, part of a trend of Seattlites doing impressively well on the quiz show. Why is our town such a hotbed of trivia pros? Ken Jennings theorizes it’s because it gets dark so early we all head indoors to watch the show on the regular.

Baseball man on getting hit in the face with a fastball: “Feels good.” I don’t know anything about baseball but I have to assume getting hit in the face with an object traveling 97 miles an hour is not supposed to happen. Amazingly, Bryce Harper says he’s doing just fine. Good grief.

Microsoft is fixing one annoying thing about Windows. An upcoming fix will address that weird thing that happens when your monitors go to sleep, and then when they wake up, the windows are all jumbled up. So that’s nice — one irritating quirk down, five billion to go. Any word on native PDF integration? No? Cool, cool cool cool.

The hunt is on for Microsoft’s next font. The tech company is retiring Calibri and is on the hunt for something new. Tenorite, Bierstadt, Skeena, Seaford, or Grandview? They’re asking users to weigh in.

It’s a big travel day on Mars. The Ingenuity helicopter will try for a brief flight on Mars today, the fourth attempt for the little guy. Once it’s airborne, the chopper will check for drive-time traffic conditions. Just kidding! It’ll photograph sand ripples, which sounds like a freshman art school project.

Congratulations to Google for getting a search bar. Google’s game service Stadia will get a search bar, at long last. How did a Google product not have a search function from launch??? Who even knows. Stadia, if you’re not familiar, is basically the Quibi of game services, in that we all have to pretend it’s a real thing but probably not for much longer.

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Grace Jones has one question for you. I can’t stop thinking about what this shoot must have been like. How many takes do you think they recorded?