Alex Wong/Getty
Fuck this guy. Alex Wong/Getty

Senate Republicans are total fuckwads: After the Dems rankled Sen. Joe Manchin to vote in favor of allowing debate on their sweeping new voting rights bill, which would overhaul federal elections, Senate Republican filibustered it today. Presided over by Vice President Harris, the chamber was split 50-50, with no GOP senators crossing the aisle to vote to advance the For the People Act, reports The Hill. This comes after the 2020 election saw the rise of early and mail-in voting during the pandemic, with Trump lying that widespread voter fraud caused his defeat. In the wake of November 2020, over a dozen states—like Georgia and Florida— restricted ballot access for many Americans, hitting minority voters the hardest.

Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell said the Democrat-supported legislation was really an "effort of the federal government to take over the way we conduct elections in this country." A cretin. Senate Majority Leader Chuck Schumer said of the For the People Act's defeat, "This voter suppression cannot stand."

Are Dems satisfied with how shitty the filibuster is? It's gotta go.

Alleged California pistachio thief apprehended: A 34-year-old man was arrested in connection to the 42,000 pounds of pistachios that went missing earlier this month, reports the BBC. The man had big dreams to resell the stash, moving the nuts from "their original 2,000lb (907kg) sacks into smaller bags for resale."

OK, I have to admit that I haven't been following the NYC mayoral race that closely: But I love Vulture's roundup of fictional New Yorkers and who they'd vote for. The idea of both Charlotte from Sex and the City and Adam from Girls voting for Andrew Yang just makes sense to me.

We are not going to hit Biden's vaccination goal of partially vaccinating 70% of all adults 18 and older by the Fourth of July: Today, the White House conceded that we'll miss that benchmark but that the U.S.'s vaccination program has "succeeded beyond our highest expectations."

Zooming in: 70% of all Americans over 30 are vaxxed, with the expectation that 70% of Americans over 27 will hit that goal by Independence Day, reports NBC News. Goal or not, people will be turning up this July 4 sans masks.

Singer Billie Eilish apologizes for mouthing racist slur in TikTok video: If you care, read her apology here.

As Rich mentioned in AM this morning: It's going to be really fuckin' hot this week and next. Authorities urge that if you seek refuge in the cold-ass bodies of water that surround us, you should: wear a life vest or floatation device of some kind, swim along the shoreline, and let your friends know where you are. The recent drownings show that cold water is no joke! Be safe and stay cool!

I have said that I will never get married unless it's by a Cher impersonator in Vegas: But getting hitched in a pink storage container by an Elvis impersonator at the Georgetown Trailer Park Mall clocks in at a close second. Erika Schultz from the Seattle Times has all the deets (and pics).

Five Black police officers in the University of Washington campus police department seek $8 million in damages, "describing a culture of entrenched racism that has included racial slurs, vicious comments about Black people and open hostility directed at them and at members of the public," reports Mike Baker for the New York Times. The officers allege that they would find bananas placed in front of their lockers and overhear white colleagues referring to other Black employees with racial slurs, within incidents ranging from several years ago to last month. UW officials say they were "stunned" by the allegations and were not previously aware of any of the incidents these officers have described.

The U.S. Federal Trade Commission will likely review Amazon's purchase of MGM: As GeekWire notes, this is an unusual move as the Department of Justice usually conducts investigations into media and entertainment acquisitions. Lina Khan, who was recently confirmed as the head of the FTC, has been a vocal critic of Big Tech, which adds some pizzazz into this $8.5 billion proposed purchase. Bezos is probably busy thinking about space.

Trump (allegedly) drank the bleach: Giving an interview from a Colombian jail cell awaiting extradition to the US, weirdo Mark Grafton claims he got his Miracle Mineral Solution (industrial-strength bleach) into Trump's grubby paws and mouth just before the president hailed the powers of disinfectant, reports The Guardian. Trump's office has yet to respond to these claims. But I wouldn't put it past him.

Britney Spears wanted out of her conservatorship for years: Court records obtained by the New York Times show that the pop star "expressed serious opposition to the conservatorship earlier and more often than had previously been known," dating as far back as 2014. Specifically, Spears protested her father's large role in the conservatorship, "citing his drinking, among other objections on a 'shopping list' of grievances." Britney is scheduled to speak before a Los Angeles court tomorrow. In the meantime, why don't you watch Britney: For the Record?

🚨Lil' earthquake alert 🚨: Officials recorded a 3.2 magnitude quake around 25 miles northwest of Olympia yesterday evening, reports KING 5. The news agency said "[m]ore than a dozen people as far as Tacoma reported feeling it to the USGS."

Vote in this scientific poll for research purposes: We're planning an outdoor screening of a film from our Unstreamable column and need help picking a film.

For people who care about sports: The Seattle Seahawks announced that they will allow full capacity at their games this fall at Lumen Field, reports the Seattle P.I. Vaccination is not a requirement, but those who have not gotten the stab must wear a mask (though you won't be required to show proof of vaccination). University of Washington's Husky Stadium and Washington State University's Martin Stadium made similar announcements.

Biden signed legislation making Juneteenth a federal holiday not even a week ago and we already have some white foolishness on our hands: An Atlanta Ikea is facing backlash after creating a Juneteenth menu for the store's cafe that included watermelon, mac and cheese, and collard greens without any input from the store's employees, reports The Hill. 33 workers called out after the menu dropped.

For your listening pleasure: Man....it's a hot one.