A couple weeks ago, we posted instructions on how to get a Book o’ Mormon delivered to your home. The more we order, the more it costs the church. To our delight, once you sign up on the Mormon’s website, they offer to do more than just mail a book—they vow to send two in-the-drawers Mormons to your door. The pair will foist on you a 400-page doorstop, and you get the chance to scold the fresh-faced missionaries for their part in a pyramid-tithing PAC that has foisted its bigotry on millions of Americans.

But, when we posted it, we weren’t certain that signing up would actually summon two young "elders" to the door. But alas, writes Slog reader Zach:

Some time back you posted a call for us all to go to the Mormon's website and request a book of Mormon just to tax their resources as a group. Well, I did and the Mormon missionaries assigned to Capitol Hill just came over and delivered the book of Mormon.


They were really nice, clean-cut, 19 year old caucasion boys, pretty cute, too. Both boys were dressed quite nicely in crisp suits. We made pleasant talk for about 5 minutes and then I very calmly told them that it was absolutely reprehensible for their church to fund the disenfranchisement of an entire group of people with the Prop 8 stuff in California.

They said, “we have to do what we believe is right and we believe marriage should be reserved for one man and one woman.”

I jokingly thanked them for "letting me yell" at them and they shook my hand and went on their way. The whole episode took about 15 minutes.

They said that only 4 people from Capitol Hill had requested books of Mormon as a result of your post. I thought there would be way more than that.

Maybe if people know that the 2 Mormons who will deliver the book are cute 19-year-old boys they will be more inclined to set up a time to get a free book of Mormon and (at least for me) it really is cathartic to tell them how upsetting and angry their bullshit prop-8 shenanigans are. I checked with the guys and they're the only 2 Mormons covering ALL of Capitol Hill.

Within minutes of you registering your info on the church’s central website for a free Book of Mormon, the Mormon Church will route a text message to these boy’s phones with your name, address and phone number. The website matches your zip-code with the missionary’s cell phones who are assigned to your zip code. They will call within a day.

If only the gays were this organized.


It works, it works… For the love of Joseph Smith… IT WORKS! Two 19-year-old Mormon boys will be dispatched by text message. Can the gays be this organized? Yes we can. Thou hast heard the word from Zach: Call unto your domicile two strapping young lads and then unleash their retribution. Anyone who signs up to be a Mormon missionary ought to know that it comes with a payback.

Send them your address. Put on the kettle for their arrival. Go here. Do it now.

Private to people who say luring Mormons to your house to berate their church is juvenile: They started it.