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To coincide with Earth Day, the folks at Disneynature released another mediocre montage of amazing footage:

It’s essentially: Look at this crazy fish! Now look at that crazy fish! Look at this whale! What’s that over there? Fuck, it’s a shrimp! Look at it! Fuuuuuck!!! There’s no narrative through-line, no charming polar bear family to cling to, no genuine attention to science or real information of any kind. It’s just a visual list of cool fish accompanied by a series of dreamy, borderline-nonsensical statements “narrated” by Pierce Brosnan. “To really know the ocean, you have to live it.” Oh, do I? “The larva of a sea urchin is like an asteroid.” Is it, now? “The ocean smiles at the sky.” That doesn’t mean anything!

Read the full review (including the most amazing nonsense sentence of all time) HERE. Then, join in the comments where concerned citizen "Smarter Than Lindy" makes this excellent point:

Hmm, seeing as how it's put out by Disney, I'd have to say that you probably thought it was dumb because it was intended as an entertaining beginner's introduction to the ocean for AMERICAN CHILDREN.

It's for the mind of a simple, naive, uneducated, young child who has to first be entertained with bright colors and unusual animals and emotional music before they'll absorb any complicated information. If anyone older or more intelligent gets something out of it, great! But it's not made for them exclusively. That much should have been obvious...

I'll ignore the old troll trope of defending a movie you haven't actually seen yet, because whatever. But the idea that a movie can be a choppily edited mess of squandered potential because it's "just for children" is idiotic. First of all, children are smart, and they can absorb the shit out of some complicated information. That is their entire job. But second of all, a movie can be intellectually appropriate for a child and still function as a well-constructed piece of art. Obviously. Or do you just feed your children garbage because their simple, naive, uneducated young palates can't tell the difference? Anyway, join the fray here.