Truly, there's something about the way he swallows the second syllable of Gaga that's like the sound of someone becoming decrepit.

From Time.com's collection of the Top 10 Grumpiest Andy Rooney Segments, which was brought to my attention by MetaFilter.

Also, to be fair, unless you are already dead, you are slowly turning into Andy Rooney. I was alerted to this fact just yesterday, when I woke up not-dead, set about my day, and eventually heard myself utter the sentence, "There are too many raisins in this Raisin Bran." True story.

Speaking of old people saying kooky things, 69-year-old former sex symbol/triple divorcee Raquel Welch has blamed the ruination of the institution of marriage on the Pill.