What's the book? Historical Tweets, by Alan Beard and Alec McNayr.

The Prom, playing May 31st-June 19th at The 5th Avenue Theatre
The Prom is a musical comedy about big Broadway stars on a mission to change the world.

Why is it useless? It's a collection of "humorous" Twitter posts by historical figures. The problem is that the humor is so fucking hackneyed that it wouldn't even make it to a Jay Leno monologue. Here is a Twitter post by Richard Nixon:

@Kissinger Which button do I push to erase my last 18 and a half Tweets?

Thomas Edison:

Damn candles! Will never get lucky unless I can "set the mood" w/o setting bed on fire.


Trying new diet. Want to get back into my skinny jeans.

Henry Ford:

@AssemblyLine Dudes, where's my cars?

Could anyone enjoy this book? This is the unfunniest book I've read in years. The simple fact that it exists makes me furious. Please don't buy this book. If you know someone who has bought this book, please convince him or her to return it. Humanity as a species cannot allow this book to survive.

Day In • Day Out returns this summer, August 12th thru 14th!
Featuring The National, Mitski, Mac DeMarco and more! Full lineup and tickets at dayindayoutfest.com