Still Infallible Heroes: Independent review forgives Seattle firefighters for lack of training and proper equipment in deadly Fremont blaze.

“A Loyal Son”: 42 year-old man from Black Diamond convicted in mother’s death by bedsores gets three years and three months. Son argues her final days (seeped in blood, urine, and pus) were exactly what she wanted.

It’s a Goddam Fallujah Up in Here: Mexican drug cartel uses car bomb qualifying the country for FUBAR status.

Their Bad: State to pay $2.1 million to the family of a three year-old who was abused and eventually killed by his mother’s boyfriend despite alerts from the boy’s father to Child Protective Services. Mother’s boyfriend: “[the boy] acted like an asshole”.

Guess Who’s Back: The barefoot bandit.

It was for Science!: Center found to inject mentally ill people with “potentially dangerous impurities”. Research is suspended.

The Replacement: Senate seat of finally dead Robert C Byrd is filled.

Real Estate is Profitable Again!: Dino Rossi reports an income between a shit ton and a real shit ton ($380,000 and $1.5 million respectively).

A Decepticon of Sorts: McCain is (rightfully) accused of political shape shifting in a debate among three arguably terrible choices for his Arizona senate seat.

The Golden Tickets!: Some tickets for cell phone use may be invalidated due to a technicality.

Maybe a dingo: Australian PM announces general election in August. Race expected to be close, with no clear favorite.