Last Monday night, Seattle police were called to a White Center home—twice—to settle a dispute over a camper truck parked in front of the residence. The argument eventually ended with the camper being used for early morning target practice.

Usually we paraphrase police reports for brevity's sake but this police report doesn't need paraphrasing. It is a gem. From the report:

[Man 1—we'll call him Gary—the camper owner] and [Man 2—we'll call him Steven—the homeowner] were interviewed.

[Gary] said he told [Steven] his truck/camper was broken down but he would try and move it in the morning. [Steven] was insistent it be moved immediately. [Steven] was drunk.

[Gary] was told of the City of Seattle parking ordinance 72 hr sticker/rule. [Gary] was still refusing to believe the law and was given an actual 72 hr notice.

[Steven] had bloodshot-wattery [sic] eyes and smelled of alcohol on his breath. [Steven was] told the 72 hr notice would be given and then was told to go home. [Steven] returned home.

[Gary's] vehicle was issued the 72 hr notice. [Gary] said he'd get his brother to help him move the trailer in the morning. [Gary] was told to go back to his trailer and not provoke [Steven] because he was drunk.

[Gary] said he was going to sleep. [Gary] climbed into the sleeper cabin at the front top of the trailer. [Roughly a half-hour later, Gary] heard something hitting into the trailer and called 911.

[Gary] said he heard laughing from [Steven] to the West of his trailer.

When police arrived, officers discovered 11 target arrows were shot in the direction of the trailer from/by [Steven's] home. 2 arrows penetrated the metal trailer near where [Gary] was sleeping. One arrow went 4" into the trailer, the other arrow 8 " into the trailer.

After trying to get [Steven] to give up, and with the Lt. Smith in control of the scene, a 2 1/2 hr standoff occurred until [Steven] gave himself up.