The preexisting punishment of a self-inflicted 60-day potato-diet is beating impeachment in the official Slog poll about the fate of the Washington Potato Commissioner, so let us consider this new COMPLETELY BIZARRE piece of evidence:

Citizens of Washington: If you're going to make a big COMPLETELY BIZARRE deal out of making mashed potatoes like a man, you ought to eat two months' worth of potatoes like a man, not with expressions of regret. Regret—like cutting herbs with scissors, thinking different, and mashing potatoes by first actually cooking them and then using a potato-masher instead of a makeshift cannon, a can of hairspray, your children, and a broomhandle—is for the ladies, is it not?

If you haven't voted, now is the time.