I've been insisting on total quiet last couple times, and it's just a little too quiet. So tonight it'll be symphonies and stuff. Special guest Dow Constantine will be in the house, and rumor has it the poet Heather McHugh might drop in. Also rumored to be in attendance: The Stranger's David Schmader, Dominic Holden, and Paul Constant. The drink special will be a $4 perfect Manhattan. Tonight, 6 pm, Sorrento Hotel, corner of Madison and 9th, free.

Oh yeah, if you weren't there last time, you missed a funny thing: Michael Hebb—curator of the Sorrento's cultural offerings—comes in and says hello to a couple people and then glides quietly across the room to talk to John Roderick, who was slumped into a big leather chair next to a marble end table. Hebb is all smoothness, all casual-cool, and as he was shaking Roderick's hand he sat gently on the marble end table and—CRACK! BLAM! SPLINTER! The marble table top and the wooden post holding it up break apart, the marble table top rolling away and crashing into a wall, Hebb crashing or nearly crashing to the floor. To his credit, he handled it perfectly: He laughed harder than anyone. More info about the reading party is here.