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It's all skinny and smug and probably coked to the gills and won't even say hi to you and it LITERALLY NEVER LEAVES PIKE ST! You know, there are other neighborhoods in Seattle besides Capitol Hill. Jerk.

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Annual Seattle Erotic Art Festival and Halloween party returns to Seattle Center October 29 –31!
A weekend of art, performance, readings, & more! Festival ends at Seattle's sexiest Halloween party.