Former Republican presidential candidate Alan Keyes is just like Adolf Hitler, only taller, darker, and not responsible for the deaths of six million jews.
  • Source: WikiMedia
  • Former GOP presidential candidate Alan Keyes is often compared to Adolf Hitler, only taller, darker, and not responsible for the deaths of six million jews.

Former presidential candidate Alan Keyes, most notable for being one of maybe five black Republicans most Americans can name, has added his own unique "thoughts" to the DOMA debate. Writing in the crazy, Christianist, conspiratorial echo chamber that is WorldNetDaily (motto: "A Free Press for People Who Believe that Obama Was Born in Kenya"), Keyes plumbs the depths of his bottomless wellspring of wingnuttery, by provocatively equating same-sex marriage with the institution of slavery.

Government doesn't endow people with the ability to procreate the species. The Creator takes care of that. Like all unalienable rights, those associated with the natural family exist in consequence of this endowment. A couple that cannot, by nature, procreate has no claim to those rights. Nor can government grant them a semblance of it without impairing the claims of one or both of the parents biologically implicated in the physical conception of the child. The DOMA simply makes more explicit the government's obligation to secure the Creator-endowed unalienable rights of the natural family. This obligation precludes government from fabricating other rights that impair them. In this respect, granting homosexuals the right to marry is like granting plantation owners the right to own slaves.

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For the sake of context, I've reproduced as much of Keyes' arguments as I reasonably could without making my eyes bleed, but... um... really Alan? Isn't an African American like you comparing slavery to marriage equality, kinda like a Jewish American like me comparing the Holocaust to, say, the ruthless genocide of innocent words that is your post?


This trumpkin is scary enough. Please vote.
Then score some dank herb from Ruckus to help with the stress.