Click to get this shit all up in your face.
  • Click to get this shit all up in your face.
Yesterday, the good folks at Cupcake Royale sent us four of their maple whiskey bacon cupcakes, which are the CR cupcakes of the month for March. This is in honor of St. Patrick's Day, because the Irish love bacon. No, just kidding! Everybody knows the Irish are all unrepentant drunks.

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Here's the thing about eating a maple whiskey bacon cupcake: You only do it for the novelty. "Oh," you might say to yourself, "That cupcake has bacon on it! How incongruous!" And then you eat it and you're all like, "That wasn't nearly as disgusting as I was afraid it would be! In fact, the salty and sweet flavors complement each other!" It's pretty okay. And then you forget you ate it.

And then the aftertaste kicks in. About fifteen minutes after eating a half a cupcake, my mouth tasted like a Candyland hangover. That weird taste you get after you eat a ton of sugar? It's there, along with old bacon and a faint whiskey flavor. I suspect if you try it once, for novelty's sake, you probably won't want another one for a year.

This trumpkin is scary enough. Please vote.
Then score some dank herb from Ruckus to help with the stress.