I'm All He's Got


I'm sure he wishes he could quit you.
I think it's perfect. He's such a fucking cry baby.
Boohoo Dan made me a laughingstock. It wasn't my fault, it's Dan's fault. Boohoo! BOO FUCKING HOO!
Dan, stop trashing him! Wouldn't we be better off if he was the republican nominee? Think of the mileage you'd get! The man will never be president, so can't we toy with him a little longer and then bring him proudly to the doorsteps of our beloveds as a bloody gift? You're shooting fish in a barrel here, and I know you're better than that.
Republican presidential hopefuls who are watching their dreams die are paper towels see??? They cant be anything else....
They could at least get the URL right. SpreadSantorum.com isn't a pro-Santorum site disguised as SpreadingSantorum.com, is it?
Wait - he compers your 18(?)-year-relationship with the BIAHIC to pedophilia and bestiality (and would just as soon take your son away from you) - but YOU are the hate activist?

Is this bizarro world?

Argh. I really can spell, just not type well with a cat blocking the screen.
I think they are confused about which Santorum is unsuited for publication.
never mind he invokes the Babs effect when he complains about it. Dude is such a mess.


The Streisand effect is a primarily online phenomenon in which an attempt to hide or remove a piece of information has the unintended consequence of publicizing the information more widely. It is named after American entertainer Barbra Streisand, whose attempt in 2003 to suppress photographs of her residence inadvertently generated further publicity.
who the fuck is still funding this loser's campaign?
new meaning to 'man on dog action'.
@5 - never fear. Spreadingsantorum.com is the first result when it says "Page not found -- were you looking for....?"

Also @9, that's fabulous. I didn't know there was a word for it.

I love the fact that this guy is now ruining his own life by encouraging people to Google him. Dan, you're a genius. (a hateful genius with a perverted sense of humor, i.e. the best kind)
@10 probably the Catholic Church, at this point.

I fixed it for you! Anyone who googles the NY Daily News' typo now gets directly to home base.

Try it now: http://spreadsantorum.com

You're most welcome! (Takes a bow...)

Outstanding work, @14!
Rick Santorum really doesn't see the irony of calling Dan Savage a "hate activist"? Does he not listen to his own opinions as they stumble out of his mouth? Because they're a lot more vulgar than the new definition of his name. I'll gladly take santorum over Santorum any day.
inb4 Alleged
I would like to see Santorum "push" his way into a number of Republicans. But I think that would compound the shit out of his problems. (Look, I made another funny!)
What part of "a napkin is a napkin" don't you people understand?!
@19, the part about paper towels. :-)
@19, @20 Rick Frothy-Fecal-Lube Suburban-Whitebread-Boy Santorum has obviously never been to a real barbecue, or a crab boil or a crawfish fest, where all the more serious participants recognize the clear advantage of paper towels.

And the brand-new registered domain, spreadsantorum.com should have propagated through most of the 'nets by now. Thank you, NY Daily News for the opportunity to assist in the propagation of the redefinition of Frothy's name!
I just couldn't stop laughing at the image of Sarah Palin "toss a word salad." Thank you, Dan!
Please forgive my poor wording. I rarely comment and just remembered you can't edit.
I like how he calls Dan a "folk hero." Makes it sound like we're sitting around a campfire singing songs about his legendary exploits. Which we totally are.
Really, though, how is "the frothy mix of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex" "vulgar and unsuited for publication"? Is it "frothy"? "Lube" instead of "lubricant"? It uses technical terms, no swearing, and isn't gratuitous. Is it considered vulgar to acknowledge in any way that anal sex ever happens?

@6: Yes, Republican candidates and a large portion of their political base no longer live in this reality. For example, check out this Krugman article.

@19: The part where I use paper towels to wipe my mouth and napkins to wipe up spills, depending on what is most convenient at the time. :-P
#5, you must Google 'Santorum' and then click on SpreadingSantorum.com in the results in order for it to remain high-ranked in the Google search results. Google doesn't know Santorum = SpreadingSantorum unless you make the connection via your interaction with the results page.

If you have time, can also do it again and click the Wikipedia entry for the frothy mix to keep that one high in the rankings too.

Just DO NOT go to Santorum's own website from the Google results or you'll be diluting the effect of Dan's brilliant campaign.
@25: while not containing any swearing, it fails what we in the Mainstream Media like to call "the breakfast test."
Clearly, ol' Ricky is talking about napkins and paper towels as a proxy for his name. He seems to be saying marriage cannot be gay marriage, but he wants to say "I'm not poopy juice." Hence the need for paper wipe-ups.

So... just exactly what happened when you, Dan, and he were roomies?! Inquiring minds...