Superfluous Tuesday. Mitt Romney is expected to cruise to victories today in Republican presidential primaries in Pennsylvania, Connecticut, New York, Delaware, and Rhode Island. No one cares.

Um, hasn't Mitt Romney ever raised a young person? Presumptive Republican presidential nominee Mitt Romney declared yesterday that "young voters in this country have to vote for me," pretty much assuring that young voters won't.

The Republican Party is bankrupt. No, really. The Minnesota Republican Party is facing eviction from its headquarters after falling 9 months behind in its rent. Two million dollars in debt, the state GOP risks adding financial bankruptcy to the moral kind.

Saints ain't. On the heels of a "bounty ball" scandal that saw its coaches and general manager hit with substantial fines and suspensions, the New Orleans Saints are now facing a potential federal investigation over allegations that they electronically eavesdropped on visiting coaches for years. Anybody who knows football knows that this has the making of a huge scandal.

"Pineapples don’t have sleeves." If you don't get why this has become a favorite punchline among 8th graders nationwide, then you've got no idea how ridiculous our current regime of standardized testing is.

And I have a space bridge to sell you. A group of "high-tech tycoons" is setting up a company to mine asteroids for precious minerals, and idea straight out of science fiction. Unfortunately, at a cost of about a half billion dollars an ounce, the profits will likely be fictional too.

Hmm, maybe investing in asteroid mining doesn't look so bad. Just weeks ahead of its initial public offering, Facebook has announced that both revenue and profits are down.

We're number one! The state liquor store at 12th and Pine, comfortingly visible from Frizzelle's window, attracted the highest bid of any liquor store in Seattle in the online fire sale auction of WA's liquor monopoly. The $500,100 bid for the 12th and Pine store was part of the $30.75 million raised auctioning off a system that has generated billions of dollars of profits for taxpayers over the years. Hope the employees there enjoy their new non-union, minimum wage jobs!

It wasn't the heat. It was the bullets. The two women found dead in a suspicious North Bend fire had been shot to death.

Yes, but what will it cost in another couple decades when we finally get our shit together to build it? The cost of replacing the Elliott Bay seawall along the downtown Seattle's waterfront is now projected to come in at about $300 million, below the prior $310 million to $390 million estimated range. Expect more coverage of the seawall project as Seattle reporters desperately look for excuses to work the word "gribbles" into a sentence.

Why ruin such a perfect system? A new study finds that an appendectomy in California costs between $1,500 and $182,955, sometimes leaving even fully insured patients in bankruptcy. The Affordable Care Act that Rob McKenna is fighting so hard to repeal would force hospitals to publish their prices for common procedures, but I suppose that would just mess up the obvious efficiency of the way the market is working now.

And finally, an animated Barack Obama: