I wanna thank everyone who came out to the Neptune Theater last night for the first—but definitely not the last—live taping of an episode of the "Savage Lovecast." We raised over $15,000 for Washington United for Marriage. (There's still time to donate—just click here!) I also wanna thank everyone who helped to make the evening such a success: Ed Murray, Garfunkel & Oates, Nancy Hartunian, Carey Christie, Seattle Theater Group, the gang from Washington United, and—of course—the tech-savvy, at-risk youth. We couldn't do the show without 'em.

And now, as promised, answers to some of the audience questions that we weren't able to get to before we ran out of time last night...

Pacific Northwest Ballet’s The Nutcracker is Back Onstage at McCaw Hall! Tickets start at $27.
Join PNB for a timeless tale of holiday adventure performed by PNB’s amazing dancers and orchestra.


What will you be doing for Pride next weekend?

I'll be doing Minneapolis for Pride next weekend. (And, yes, this is an actual audience-member question—and it was at the top of the pile when I picked the cards up just now.) To order tickets for "Savage Love Live" at the Pantages Theatre click here!


I'm a femme & my girlfriend is a butch in the streets/femme in the sheets. How do I learn to fuck her better?

Practice, practice, practice—and watch, watch, watch porn together. Your girlfriend should point at the computer screen and scream, "Like that! Like that!", whenever she sees someone getting fucked the way she'd like to be fucked.


I'm worried that I'm close-minded. I'm a biologist and understand the difference between "gender" and "sex." But I don't feel comfortable with people officially changing their sex (w/IDs). I know that, no matter what you want to be called or however you change your anatomy, you're still XX or XY. (Or XXY.) Explain why IDs can be changed.

Because they can. Because the brain is gendered. Because your discomfort isn't a veto. And, Mr. Science, if you think people's gender identities should be determined solely by XX or XY... what do you propose to do about with women with androgen insensitivity syndrome? Tackle 'em, drag 'em to the DMV, and issue 'em male IDs?


Dan, why doesn't my boyfriend like to fuck outside? How can I get him to try?

Why doesn't he like to fuck outside? I have no idea. But at this stage you should have some idea—I mean, what did he tell you when you asked? As for getting him to try it, well, ask again sometime when he's good and drunk. That trick has always worked on me. (Just ask Terry.)


My boyfriend won't go down on me to make me come after sex. How can I convince him he won't eat his own spunk?

There's no way to guarantee him that he won't at taste some of his own spunk if he goes down on you after he comes. So why not have him go down on you before he comes, get you off one or two times, and then let him fuck you? (Please don't say "after sex" when you what you mean is "after he comes." Sex doesn't begin and end with his orgasms. Your orgasms and satisfaction matter too. And you haven't gotten off yet, and you're still messing around, then you're still having sex.


Why do I pee when I try to make myself throw up?

No idea.


I'm a woman in my mid-30s, married with a young child, and in the past year I have started questioning my sexuality. I came out to my husband as Questioning and we are seeing a couple's counselor and talking about opening our marriage so I can explore & figure myself out. Is there a better way to figure out your sexuality?

It's better to figure out your sexuality before you marry someone and have a child with him. Glad your husband is open to openness and open to counseling. Good luck.


How does one decide who pays for dinner on a first same-sex date?

If one person has very clearly asked another person(s) out on a date—it's not just an invite to hang out sometime; it's a date—then the asker-outer pays. This applies to same-sex and opposite-sex asker-outers alike.


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Is it wrong that I refer to my boyfriend as the Chewbacca to my Han Solo?



How do you know if you are in love?

The red crystal embedded in the crack of your ass begins to flash.


Is it better to be gay, straight, or bi?

The premise of your question is deeply offensive to the pansexual, asexual, and questioning communities. Please leave your full name in the comments thread, along with your home and work addresses, and an ally of the pansexual, asexual, and questioning communities will be dispatched shortly to glitterbomb you.


When do you give up on a relationship?

When that red crystal stops flashing.