Slog tipper Kyle says that evangelicals are considering a boycott of Google to protest Google's strong support of same-sex marriage. The problem is, it's going to be tooooo haaaaaaaard:

It's more than just a search engine. Many of us have Android phones ... many of us use Google Calendar, Google Tasks, and Gmail... YouTube, and all the other things, it's not just the search engine.

It's even worse than just Google being ubiquitous. Are evangelicals going to use Bing, instead? Microsoft is a huge supporter of gay marriage. There are very few tech and internet providers with values that the American Family Association will find suitable. The only solution is for them to start using typewriters and cast aside the whole internet as evil. It would be like a reverse Rapture: The internet would be heavenly for those of us Left Behind.