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A top Republican in Georgia has sounded an ominous warning that legalization of same-sex marriage may also lead to fraud. Sue Everhart, chairwoman of the Georgia Republican Party, told the Marietta Daily Journal in a story published Saturday that once gay nuptials are legally permitted, there will be nothing to stop a straight person from exploiting the system in order to claim marital benefits. “You may be as straight as an arrow, and you may have a friend that is as straight as an arrow,” Everhart said. “Say you had a great job with the government where you had this wonderful health plan. I mean, what would prohibit you from saying that you’re gay, and y’all get married and still live as separate, but you get all the benefits?"

This nightmare scenario—straight people getting married (or staying married) for the benefits!—happens all the time. If Ms. Everhart wants to prevent straight people from marrying other straight people for their "wonderful health plans," as opposed to their awesome oral/anal/bondage skills, she should support a single-payer health-care plan. If the United States had a health-care system like Canada does, no one would marry—no one would have to marry—to obtain benefits. Linking health care to marriage is 1. unfair to single people and 2. tempts gay and straight to marry for the all the wrong reasons. Not for love, not for life, but for Aetna.

As for this...

Everhart also expressed a distaste for homosexuality, which she argued is unnatural. “Lord, I’m going to get in trouble over this, but it is not natural for two women or two men to be married,” Everhart said. “If it was natural, they would have the equipment to have a sexual relationship.”

After screaming and yelling for years—for centuries—about the evils, the dangers, the health risks, the immorality, the irresistible allure, etc., of all the hot and sweaty buttsecks the gays were having, the haters are now suddenly claiming that we can't have sex at all. We shouldn't be allowed to marry, says Chicago's Cardinal George, because gay people can't consummate our marriages. We don't have the equipment to have a sexual relationship, says the chairwoman of the Georgia Republican Party, so we shouldn't be allowed to marry. I don't know how we went from gay sex being sick and sinful and irresistible—they used to argue that gay sex had to be illegal and gay people oppressed because otherwise everyone would turn gay and the human race would go extinct—to gay sex being impossible. But here we are.

In a related development...

Terry and I did the impossible last night. So we're not just gay guys anymore. We're superheroes. Or something. Because we do the impossible! All the time!