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Comments
That's because none of your male hetero friends will ever be in the position of having a hot married woman who is out of his league begging to fly into town so she can suck and fuck his brains out.
Yeah, because why not fuck up one relationship when you can fuck up two?
Saying you won't cheat? That's not honorable. Walking away from a super hot chick who's kneeling in front of you trying to unzip your pants? Now that's honorable. Crazy, but honorable.
You're a faggot!!
It's totally not cheating!!!
You can do whateverthefuck you want!
Its like, a dog isn't cheating when it humps a different bitch everyday....
Also, I am so tired of David Rakoff being dead. I miss his work a lot. He deserved more time. Goddamn it.
And if your friends keep pestering you, just ask them how they would feel if they were the other, unwitting partner in the relationship...
LW sounds like an awesome dude, BTW.
I find have total respect for this honest, deal-keeping non-prude! Thanks for showing that just because men think with their dicks doesn't mean they ARE dicks.
Amusingly, they tend to follow up "prude" with "whore" and "slut".
Unfortunately for them, I don't find even the loveliest of assholes attractive unless they are connected with a pleasant personality, and it sounds like TGP shares my standards.
P.S.
Guys who insult you for not having sex with them are still roaming the halls of their high school in their heads, covered in acne and filled with rage and entitlement. Not attractive, no matter what they look like now.
Guys like you are obsessed with fidelity because you know no other woman on the planet would fuck you besides your poor wife, and you're insecure that your wife might catch onto that fact and want to fuck other men.
Word. Plus, "HEY, you think you know me, Bub?"
Never been sure why "prude" is such a drastic insult anyway. As character flaws go, prudishness is a pretty mild one. It also doesn't hurt anyone. In fact, the only person in the world my apparent "prudishness" affects is the asshole I just said "no" to.
May I recommend this as a template for the twenty-first-century man?
although i would put it like this: monogamy is the antithesis of affection, liking, and respect. it is, essentially, domestic abuse - it is living under duress. if you happen to only want to fuck this one person, that is also your personal choice. but it is your choice. please don't make it my problem, or expect me to be comfortable about it if you decide to only have sex with me....
and i still have offers. i'm sure sendr does too. not everybody wants the same thing.
i think it's why so many of 'us' (cultural group) don't 'marry' - it's because the current western concept of 'marriage' violates so many of our basic assumptions about love and respect. lifelong vows = slavery. and why would you ever try to undermine the autonomy and self-determination of someone you claim to love??
...but like i said, i think it's cultural. if it works for you, that's fine. but don't mistake it for a universal.
I seriously thought it was your first language. I never would have known you were not a native speaker had you not said that.
Knowingly facilitating cheating is like poisoning the neighbors' pet: a sociopathic act that's of little consequence for you (it might even give you a thrill), but sure to cause terrible pain for them. I know that's a weird analogy, but it seems apt.
Cheaters are assholes, as are those who play a part in the cheating.
Some cultures—Hello, France?—are blasé about cheating, and consider it banal. It's a hold-over from Catholicism's heavy hand in molding their society. Not only were people considered basically evil, but humankind was powerless to correct itself. So you just accept your lot in this life, and hope for salvation in the next. With this worldview, you can live with a lot of asshole behavior without even bothering to cry foul. And you're free to be an asshole, too, as long as you confess before you die. Ugh.
I'm not saying the formerly Protestant north is free of cheating or general assholery, but those cultures tend to be less resigned to it—preferring to loudly object, and punish the offender. This, because their heritage allowed and even encouraged them to strive to create a heaven on Earth.
The Latin-European cultures also consider "prude" to be the ultimate insult. I guess this is a hold-over from the Roman admiration of the Greeks, which they tend to fetichise even today.
Your English wasn't perfect, TGP—I spotted only three mistakes—but it's better than most native speakers:
(1) "Some weekends ago I went to visit a friend to another city…" should be either "…in another city" or "Some weekends ago I went to another city to visit a friend…"
(2) Propose is not always a reflexive verb. While you propose to someone (asking for marriage), you can also just propose an idea or an offer. So "by the end of the night, they proposed a threesome" would be correct.
(3) "It was an excitement idea!" was the big give-away that this isn't your native language. Ideas can be exciting, but not excitement. (This makes me wonder whether you're actually French, and if so, what you think of the institutionalized cheating there.)
That's it. Three minor errors. You write well, and as I said, acted with honor.
Over-generalise much?
There's a difference between not seeing separation as the only possible reaction to cheating and being blasé about cheating?