What should they have used instead? Dipping a banana into an empty Nutella jar? Jamming a banana through a slice of starfruit?

The representation of two women having sex is also off base, but not as bad. That would work for me venomlash.

I knew it! I knew this objection was coming!

I heard you were in Berlin? :)

Banana through starfruit is actually a great suggestion.

Yes to banana through a starfruit!

Well, hetero-porn anyway.

@1 Come on, use your imagination. I think showing a taco shell on top of a bun and having the banana (or hot dog) choosing the bun would have been pretty clear.

The middle vagina on the "all shapes, sizes, and colors" would make me consider switching teams though. Shudder.

This video is great though, almost Facebook friendly.

@7: Complete opposite for me. When I saw the middle one I thought, "Oh god, if only I could experience one like that in my lifetime, I could die happy." Seriously, it instantly gave me a you know what.

My preferences aside, though, saying "I think this one example of what a woman might be like would make me think all women are unattractive forever," is a pretty harsh and, in my mind, offensive thing to say.

Hearing "Take a hot load to the face" in her English accent made me giggle a little bit.

Chopping the cucumber with a knife was sex positive?

I wish there was a non- satirical, educational version of this to show to my teenage son.
The "sex talk" is difficult enough. The "what you've probably seen on the Internet isn't real" talk is a challenge.

Banana through a starfruit: yes, yes, a thousand times yes.

Those were my thoughts exactly.

I put this up on Facebook when I saw it about a week or so ago, and I showed it to my 14- and 19-years-old daughters, too. The banana-in-Nutella may not represent a typical or desired anal outcome, but it was funny, and I thought that counted for something. But I love the idea of the starfruit.

@11 (tacomagirl): Why do you need a deadly serious version of this to show your teenage son? I think the point gets made perfectly and succinctly, and with some refreshingly safe-for-work-or-the-family-room examples.

I agree banana through starfruit would be better visually, but the noise of the banana coming out of the Nutella was spot-on.

The only thing that bothers me about this video is that she keeps saying "real people" in contrast to porn stars. Last I checked, porn stars were real people too. I wish they would have just said "ordinary people."

Only 30% of women swallow?

Could we have white chocolate sauce used for the "hot load in the face" instead of chocolate sauce?

"In real life 75% of men ejaculate within 3 minutes"

Within 3 minutes of what ? Penetration ? Humping ?

@19 Not only within what, but since when? Yeah, if you haven't done it in a couple of weeks, sure. But what about if you just got over your refractory period? Or came four times yesterday?

The more you do it in a short period, the longer it takes.

@20: per this article:

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/90940…

"Ejaculation experiments were performed with informed and consenting healthy volunteers about 20 years of age, using identical manual stimulation by the same woman, and ejaculation time was measured. The mean +/- standard deviation for the ejaculation time was 156.5 +/- 80.7 seconds, which was shown to be erection time dependent."

Also, "The Kinsey Institute reports that 75% of all males reach orgasm within 2 minutes of penetration"

@ Everyone who is pointing out that porn actors are real people, depending on the circumstances men take a lot longer to ejaculate. Yes, all true. And we here at Savage Love know our sex facts.

But to focus on these issues/details misses the point of the video, which isn't supposed to be comprehensive about the total range and variation of human sexuality.
It's supposed to deflate (heh) some porn-based myths, like the goal of our good friend Cindy Gallop's "Make Love Not Porn" site.

How come 40% trying light bondage is a lot but 40% trying anal is not?

Okay, I'm going to buy a banana and a starfruit and see if it's physically possible to put the former through a section of the latter. If I get around to it, I'll post pics/video for you pervs. Might be a good illustration of how important lube is to buttsecks...

Wonderful. Now we need one for every other genre of movie.

@23: Good point. That is so not fair!!

Holy Mother of Joss Whedon, 40% of women have tried anal?! And more than 1 in 5 would tolerate someone ejaculating on their face??!!!

Both of those numbers are way higher than I'd have guessed for non-porn-stars.

I think a pair of steamed/steaming Chinese buns getting pried apart by a banana would have been way better than a jar of Nutella (funny, but eww). And no, you don't need a perfect digestive system for great buttsex, just conscientious use of a shower hose beforehand. To misquote Lennon: "Happiness is a clean bum, woo wooo'.

@8 I'm offended that you put quotation marks around your offensive interpretation and then got offended by it.

Can we please stop perpetuating the "real" sex/porn sex false dichotomy? Porn sex is just one of many kinds of real sex—not the opposite of real sex. Also, can we get a statistic on how many people who are actually worth fucking enjoy anal and facials? I bet that percentage is a lot higher. In other words, the preponderance of boring, unfuckable people are skewing the numbers. Statistics broken down by demographic would be more informative. But anyway, I'm content to only fuck the 2–4 people out of 10 who are potentially worth fucking.

Strangely, I said exactly the same thing when I saw this video posted to Facebook weeks ago. Maybe that has something to do with how I like butt sex and I have a lot of experience with it.

@31: Unfortunately, while porn sex is a subset of real sex and, in fact, can be part of *your* sex life, a lot of kids these days grow up with the notion that porn sex is the way things *should* be. So instructional videos like this are indeed helpful.

At least, so long as they drop the Nutella.

@31 Wow, people who don't enjoy anal and/or facials are most likely boring, unfuckable, and not worth fucking?
Seriousy?

Have you learned nothing from Dan about everyone has their kinks, different things that turn them on, and not sharing the same kinks as someone else doesn't make the other person unfuckable? wtf?!

Yeah, let's just look at the statistics from people that I want to have sex with, because those are the only people that matter. *massive eye roll* Get some awareness of other people, GEEZ.

@32: I agree, people shouldn't feel that "porn" sex is the only kind of sex that they should have, but I see nothing wrong with poeple understanding that it is a kind of sex that they CAN have and enjoy with the right partner. Also, the porn sex vs. real sex argument belies the vast diversity of sex that is depicted in online porn. Go to any tube site and you will see all kinds of sex being had by all kinds of people, and it's up to you which kind you choose to watch. Watching porn is not the passive activity that it may have been in the past. Most porn consumers are no longer stuck watching the only porn that is available to them. The only common feature of most post is that most of the sex in it is performed with a viewer in mind. Exhibitionist sex is still a kind of real sex though.

@33: What I have learned from Dan is not to waste my time on people with whom I am not sexually compatible. My point, and I agree that I could have stated it less glibly, was that those statistics only really matter if everyone expects to be compatible with everyone else. I am well aware that the kinds of sex that I like to have make me unfuckable to most people. But those people probably aren't on my radar, and I'm probably not on theirs. I am aware of other people; however, I am not particularly fond of prudes, and I am not persuaded by the appeal to the majority arguments against sexual diversity that are propped up by vague statistics about the kinds of sex that most people like to have.

@8 I'm right there with you. :)

I do now what I think