Parents: Your teen could be SOLVING A CRIME RIGHT NOW. Go yell at them to stop doing their homework and pay more attention to their phone this instant.
  • Shutterstock/SpeedKingz
  • Parents: Your teen could be SOLVING A CRIME RIGHT NOW. Go yell at them to stop doing their homework and pay more attention to their phone this instant.
Did You Get That Amber Alert on Your Phone Yesterday? Well, so did 15-year-old Camryn Wood and her dad, who happened to be driving through Lacey, Washington. But instead of complaining about how crazy loud and annoying Amber Alerts are, she immediately recognized the vehicle in the Amber Alert as a nearby Dodge. "Sixty seconds after the alert came to life on her phone, Wood was on 911 telling officers they had found the car," reports KOMO News. Her dad tailed it until police arrived to safely recover the 18-month-old boy involved and returned him to his father, spawning a billion "Cell-phone-obsessed teen saves the day" headlines this morning.

"What if we said that we were dentists. Would all the dentists be upset?" That's a local FBI spokesperson, Ayn Dietrich-Williams, telling Ansel Herz why it shouldn't be that big a deal that the FBI created a fake news story that looked like it came from the AP to get a suspect to click on a spyware-containing web link. (Because impersonating health care workers is less offensive than impersonating journalists?)

The State's Tolling on 520: Is landing lots of people in trouble. If you don't pay your toll on time, the fees and penalties really add up, even though (1) not all that money will actually go to paying for the bridge and (2) mailed invoices for tolls don't actually tell you if you've accrued overdue tolls. According to KIRO 7 there are 15,000 people who still haven't paid outstanding tolls despite late fees, fines, and a hold on their car tabs. “It feels like I'm helping a broken system or sending money into a lost cause,” says one guy who owes $70 in tolls but has a $1,200 bill from the state.

The Washington State Supreme Court Just Changed the Way Our State's Rape Cases Are Decided: In a 6-3 ruling yesterday, the court reversed previous rulings and decided that the state can't make defendants in a rape case prove that their alleged victim gave consent. Forcing defendants to prove consent is "inconsistent with due-process principles," wrote Justice Debra Stephens. Critics say this decision makes it harder to prosecute rape cases.

It's "Landslide Season," Y'all: Seattle Public Utilities sent out a press release yesterday saying that "landslide season," which I didn't quite realize was a season, "will likely arrive in Seattle" by today. "The latest forecast indicates that by [Friday] over an inch of rain will fall citywide. SPU neighborhood rain gauges will have recorded nearly two inches in the past three days and nearly four inches over the past two weeks. Those totals are certain to push Seattle beyond the landslide threshold developed by the USGS and SPU,” said SPU meteorologist James Rufo-Hill. SPU encourages people to call 911 if a landslide causes you immediate concern for your safety, to call an SPU response center at (206) 386-1800 "if you see uncontrolled street water in a steep slope area," to check your slopes, downspouts, and irrigation systems, and to go here for more info about landslides.

Maine Ebola Nurse DGAF About Your Unscientific Fears: Kaci Hickox has refused to be quarantined in two states, as she believes it violates her civil rights. Now the state of Maine has gone and gotten a court order that restricts her movements, limiting her travel and banning her from public places.

A memorial for Mike Brown, who was killed by a Ferguson police officer this summer.
Ferguson Police Chief Says Neither He nor His Department Are Going Anywhere: In the face of rumors of his own resignation and the disbanding of the Ferguson, Missouri, police department, Chief Thomas Jackson says he is not resigning, his department is not disbanding, and Attorney General Eric Holder's comments about "wholesale changes" at the Ferguson PD are "irresponsible." Jackson calls himself "low-hanging fruit" for outgoing AG Holder.

Pennsylvania Survivalist Accused of Shooting a State Trooper Appears in Court: After a $10 million seven-week manhunt, Eric Frein was "detained with the handcuffs of the Pennsylvania trooper he is accused of killing," says Reuters, and made his first court appearance today.

Two Young Boys Sue Malaysian Airlines and the Malaysian Government: After their father disappeared on flight MH370.

OMG, Hungary: "Whoopsies!"* says Hungarian Prime Minister Viktor Orban as he quickly walks back his big plan to tax internet traffic, which has led to mass protests.
*Not a direct quote.

Don't Forget to Fall Back on Sunday! I mean, literally fall backward if you want (and if you do, post a video of it on the internet so we can all laugh!) but mostly, remember that Daylight Savings Time ends this weekend. Here are some stupid, stupid tips from ABC news on how to survive the event.

10 Hours of Walking in New York City as a White Man: From Funny or Die, below. Did Eddie Murphy do this better in the '80s? Yes, yes he did. But let's enjoy both.