Like Jesus, asparagus is risen! Paul Constant, The Stranger's resident ex-Catholic, says Jesus hangs around for 40 days, then feasts and flies up to heaven. Asparagus is here for a couple months, all local and pointy and green and fresh. Snap the ends of the spears off (they'll break at the right place all by themselves—miracle!), roll them around in a few tablespoons of olive oil with a goodly sprinkling of salt and pepper, then grill or roast in a hot oven until slightly floppy. Sprinkle with grated Parmesan, and feast! It's what Jesus is doing, if he's as smart as they say. (The grocery store/your place, now, a few dollars a bunch)