Opening. On the Boards imports New York-based writer and performer Marty Pottenger's "multimedia, community-based work" Abundance, exploring the prismatic question "What is enough?" For answers, Pottenger polled everyone from billionaires to minimum-wagers across the U.S.; for her findings, check out this one-weekend-only run. On the Boards, 100 W Roy St, 217-9888. $22. Through Dec 6.
ANNIE GET YOUR GUN
That old hack Irving Berlin muddles up another delightful story with those damned songs of his. Driftwood Players at Wade James Theatre, 950 Main St, Edmonds, 425-774-9600. $17-$20. Thurs-Sat at 8 pm, Sun at 2 pm. Through Dec 21.
Opening. Intiman remounts its always-excellent production of Langston Hughes' beloved "gospel song play," directed by Jacqueline Moscou and starring the Total Experience Gospel Choir. All this is perfectly fine--but when do we get Black Hanukkah? Intiman Theatre, 201 Mercer St, 269-1900. $10-$64. Opens Sat Nov 29. Tues-Thurs 7:30 pm, Fri-Sat 8 pm, Sat-Sun 2 pm. Through Dec 28.
THE CARROLLS OF QUEEN ANNE
Taproot Theatre Company images Seattle as a site of Victorian sophistication in a story that sounds filthy with "madcap." Taproot Theatre Company, 204 N 85th St, 781-9707. $18-$28. Fri-Sat at 8 pm, Wed at 7:30 pm. Through Dec 27.
* CAUCASIAN CHALK CIRCLE
A pared-down vision of Bertolt Brecht's King Solomon parable--set in the context of the Soviet Union after WWII. "True to their reputation, the folks at theater simple have delivered a convincing version of Brecht's epic with six people, a few instruments, and a ton of moxie. Their Circle isn't transcendent, but it's very, very good." (Brendan Kiley) theater simple at Freehold's East Hall Theatre, 1529 10th Ave, 325-6500. $10-$15. Thurs-Sat at 8 pm. Through Dec 6.
A CHRISTMAS CAROL
Opening. ACT remounts its always-excellent rendition of Dicken's Yuletide-learning-and-growing classic for the 98th year in a row. ACT, 700 Union St, 292-7676. $14-$36 Through Dec 27.
COLUMBO SAVES CHRISTMAS
Peter Falk (or some reasonable facsimile thereof) delivers us from evil over dinner. Northwest Murder Mysteries at Crepe de Paris, 1333 Fifth Ave, 623-4111. $50-$65. Sat at 8 pm, no performances Nov 29, Dec 13. Through Dec 20.
* THE CRUMPLE ZONE
Fresh from Los Angeles (where it won the Los Angeles Times' critics' choice award), Buddy Thomas' Crumple Zone follows the confused love lives of five gay men in Staten Island. "Five lovesick fags come crashing together in a splashy/flashy/über-trashy holiday montage of ennui, ass-sex, and way too much tinsel on that ironic damn aluminum Christmas tree. And somehow all of this makes for an adorable night of theater." (Adrian Ryan) Capitol Hill Arts Center, 1621 12th Ave, 568-8585. $12-$22. Thurs-Sat at 8 pm. Through Dec 6.
* FAR AWAY
Extended. New City presents Caryl Churchill's tale of a woman coming of age, told in three incremental jumps through several years of her life. "The production is deceptively simple, using its small stage and clever scene changes to maximum effect. The cast is excellent and understated, treating Churchill's twists on reality with believable devotion. Sincerity is the saddest comedy. " (Brendan Kiley) New City Warehouse, 2110 Airport Way S, 271-4430. $12. Thurs-Sat at 8 pm. Through Dec 13.
A group of cleverly personified kitchen utensils face an ungodly, molasses-infused threat to their secure way of life. Seattle Children's Theatre, 201 Thomas St, 441-3322. $12-$26. Fri at 7 pm, Sat-Sun at 2 and 5:30 pm. Through Dec 21.
* THE HOUSE OF YES
See Stranger Suggests. Incest is best (and if it rhymes, it must be true...) in Wendy MacLeod's Hollywood quipfest of affluence, insanity, and murder. "The House of Yes was simply made for the theater (literally and figuratively); incest, raving lunatics in pink pillbox hats, loaded guns going off--there are more fabulous reasons to see this show live than you can shake a vintage magnum of Liebfraumilch at. " (Adrian Ryan) Theater Schmeater, 1500 Summit Ave, 325-6500. $12-15. Thurs-Sat at 8 pm. Through Dec 7.
JOSEPH AND THE AMAZING TECHNICOLOR DREAMCOAT
One of those biblical musicals that were so popular in the '70s. Civic Light Opera at Shoreline Conference Center, 18560 First Ave NE, Shoreline, 363-2809. $20-$30. Fri-Sat at 8 pm, Sun at 2:30 pm. Through Dec 7.
THE LION, THE WITCH AND THE WARDROBE
An old wardrobe becomes a portal and Christ becomes a lion in this ambitious staging of C. S. Lewis' Jesus-freak classic. Seattle Children's Theatre, Seattle Center, 441-3322. $12-$30. Fri at 7 pm, Sat-Sun at 2 and 5:30 pm. Through Jan 11.
Opening. Cornish alumni present a new play by Max Moore, chronicling the fantastic adventures of contentious white-trash siblings. Odd Duck Studio, 1214 10th Ave, 324-1062. Opens Wed Dec 3. Wed-Thurs at 8 pm, Fri at 9 pm, Sat-Sun at 8 pm. Through Dec 8.
THE MANHATTAN PROJECT
One night only. Help Burnt Studio Productions send its award-winning original show Progression to New York City's HERE Arts Center by attending this one-night-only extravaganza of theatrical entertainment, including works by Bret Fetzer, John Longenbaugh, Maria Glanz, and Cha Davis. Chamber Theater, 915 E Pine St, fourth floor. $10 suggested donation at the door. Sat Nov 29 at 8 pm.
OVER THE MOON
See review this issue. Steven Dietz (Go, Dog. Go!) adapts P. G. Wodehouse with the familiarly convoluted story of love, lies, and familial entanglements set in 1920s Greenwich Village. Seattle Repertory Theatre, 155 Mercer St, 443-2222. $15-$32. Thurs-Sat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 and 7:30 pm. Through Dec 6.
The stupidest gay play ever, in the klutziest production imaginable--now extended through December! "Party is the long, drawn-out gay porn flick you never wanted to see, live. The production is lacking in almost everything, save clichés and predictability. " (Adrian Ryan) Gaydar Productions at Northwest Actors Studio, 1100 E Pike St, 267-2750. $25. Fri at 8 pm, Sat at 7 and 10 pm, Sun at 7 pm. Through Dec 7.
* PULP VIXENS
See review this issue. Local comedy heroines Pulp Vixens bring their lesbian-love-triangle-murder-mystery-on-a-train comedy, Derailed Desires, coupled with Innocent Heat, back to back at Re-bar. Re-bar, 1114 Howell St, 323-0388. $12. Sun at 8 pm, no show Sun Nov 30. Through Dec 28.
RADIO CITY CHRISTMAS SPECTACULAR
"It's difficult to isolate the point where this show stops being bizarre and enchanting, like an Old Navy commercial, and the suffering begins. Maybe it's the dancing midgets in snowman costumes, the scene with the Rockettes all dressed up as sexy anthropomorphic reindeer-women, or the show-stopping 'Santa's Gonna Rock 'n' Roll.' However, the coup de grâce is the Rockette reenactment of the Nativity, replete with live mules and camels. Anyway, the sixteen-year-old boy who was slouched in agony to my right summarized the show perfectly: 'Dude... this shit is so gay.'" (Meg van Huygen) The Rockettes at Paramount Theatre, 911 Pine St, 628-1414. $22.50-$59.50. Thurs at 7:30 pm; Fri at 8 pm; Sat at 2, 5, and 8 pm; Sun at noon, 3:30, and 7 pm; Tues at 7:30 pm; Wed at 1 and 7:30 pm. Through Dec 7.
SCARRIE: THE MUSICAL
Plug. It. Up. "All of the elements for a rip-roaring good time have been dutifully checked off the list--so why was the whole thing such a snooze? The heaviest burden rests with a director and a cast having such a good time camping it up that they neglect to make the bits tight, the timing right, or the songs on key. Let the audience have at least some of the fun." (Tamara Paris) Ghost Light Theatricals at Rendezvous, 2320 Second Ave, 441-5823. $17. Thurs-Fri at 8 pm, Sat at 8 and 10:30 pm. Through Dec 13.
A STREETCAR NAMED DESIRE
See review this issue. Tennessee Williams' timeless classic of abusive Polacks, drunken whores, and love letters yellowing with antiquity. Now with more shouting! Theatre Babylon at Union Garage, 1418 10th Ave, 720-1942. $10. Fri-Sat at 8 pm. Through Dec 6.
Just in time for the holidays, Stephen Sondheim's celebrated murder musical performed by an all-UW cast and crew. Alter Ego Productions at the UW's Playhouse Theatre. $5-$7 at the door. Opens Wed Dec 3. Wed-Sun at 8 pm. Through Dec 14.
Opening. The esteemed Everett Quinton graces Seattle with his Dickens-twisting solo show Twisted Olivia. Empty Space Theatre, 3509 Fremont Ave N, 547-7500. $10-$40. Sun-Thurs at 7:30 pm, Fri-Sat at 8 pm, Sat-Sun at 2 pm. Through Jan 10.
VOICES OF CHRISTMAS
Opening. ArtsWest stages the perennial holiday crowd-pleaser, compiling multicultural tales of Christmas. According to Vicki Merrifield, "You'll laugh, you'll cry like a baby, you'll sing, recall memories long forgotten, make new memories and along the way, you'll gain cultural insight." Trust Vicki Merrifield. ArtsWest, 4711 California Ave SW, 938-0339. $10-$15. Opens Fri Nov 28. Tues-Sun at 7:30 pm, Sat-Sun at 3 pm. Through Dec 24.
THE WIZARD OF OZ
Opening. Adapted from the movie, this new production features Laurence Ballard as the Cowardly Lion and 25 local schoolchildren as Munchkins. 5th Avenue Theatre, 1308 Fifth Ave, 292-2787. $18-$64. Tues-Wed at 7:30 pm, Thurs-Fri at 8 pm, Sat at 2 and 8 pm, Sun at 1 and 7 pm. Through Dec 21.
FESTIVALS, CABARET, & COMEDY
Final week. With Thumpers' newly instated "exclamation point only!" production policy comes Dames!, Cheryl Serio's cabaret tribute to tough women in '30s-'50s cinema. Cheryl Serio at Thumpers Restaurant and Bar, 1500 E Madison St, 328-3800. $12. Fri at 9 pm. Through Nov 28.
DECK THE HALL WITH BROADS OF BROADWAY
Opening. Talented people sing brassy Christmas numbers in a small room while you eat. Mad Dog Productions at Crepe de Paris, 1333 Fifth Ave, 623-4111. $55. Sun-Thurs at 8 pm, Fri-Sat at 8:30 pm. Through Dec 31.
DRUNK PUPPET NITE!
Final week. See review this issue. Those driven, talented freaks at Monkey Wrench Puppet Lab shove their hands up the asses of some seriously twisted creatures for another round of the wildly popular Drunk Puppet Nite!. Go, get blasted, and have your mind blown. Monkey Wrench Puppet Lab at Re-bar, 1114 Howell St, 323-0388. $15. Thurs-Sat at 8 pm, no performance Nov 27. Through Nov 29.
HAUL OUT THE HOLLY
Opening. Now in its 25th year, the beloved Seattle Men's Chorus (every member of which is gay as a whistle) presents another shamelessly schmaltzy night of holiday songs. Plus, opening weekend features American Idol's Jim Verraros! Seattle Men's Chorus at Benaroya Hall, 323-2992. $15.50-$50. Through Dec 23.
THE VON TRAPP CHILDREN
One night only. The great-grandchildren of Captain Von Trapp bust out the catchiest tunes about sex-starved goatherds you've ever heard. Kirkland Performance Center, 350 Kirkland Ave, Kirkland, 425-893-9900. $11-$26. Sat Nov 29 at 2 and 7:30 pm.
Opening. The evergreen holiday classic, gussied up with Maurice Sendak's genius design. Pacific Northwest Ballet at McCaw Hall, 321 Mercer St, 441-2424. $17-$94. Through Dec 28.
THE NUTCRACKER PUPPET BALLET
Opening. For those who prefer puppets to ballerinas (and $9.50 tickets to $94 tickets). Northwest Puppet Center, 9123 15th Ave NE, 523-2579. $7.50- $9.50. Fri at 7:30 pm, Sat-Sun at 1 and 3 pm. Through Dec 21.
* CARLOTTA'S LATE NIGHT HOLIDAY WINGDING
The delightful alter ego of Troy Mink defrosts the turkey early this year with this season's sampling of holiday delights. Ursa Major Theatre at Northwest Actors Studio, 1100 E Pike St, third floor, 325-6500. $8-$10. Fri-Sat at 10:30 pm. Through Dec 20.
* UP IN YOUR GRILL PRESENTS A STREETCAR NAMED DESIRE
This week only. Local-boy-made-good Mike Daisey makes more good with this sketch-comedy adaptation of the sexy Southern classic, conceived and performed with his Up in Your Grill cronies. Up in Your Grill at Union Garage, 1418 10th Ave. Pay what you can at the door. Fri-Sat Nov 28-29 at 11 pm.
BUBBA AND BITCH at Bar, 322-1788.
CABARET: THE ResERECTION at Coffee Messiah, 861-8233.
* THE HOKUM HALL VARIETY SHOW at Hokum Hall, 937-3613.
JET CITY IMPROV at Historic University Theater, 352-8291.
LATE NIGHT CATECHISM from Seattle Theatre Project at ACT, 292-7676.
TEATRO ZINZANNI 2301 Sixth Ave, 802-0015.