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I, Anonymous

Spooge Is Litter, Too

by Anonymous

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Steven Weissman

Okay, guys. I'm as big a fan of public sex as anyone. When you two business-suit-wearing boys went into the handicap stall of the men's bathroom together for a quickie at the hotel where I work, I didn't think it was a big enough deal to stop you. Next time I will. You two left your semen on the floor and walls of the stall. You're jacking and sucking not two feet from a roll of toilet paper and a convenient way to flush away the evidence. That's not convenient enough for you? You know who has to clean up your misplaced yuppie baby-gravy? A 90-pound grandmother and housekeeper had to get all of her biohazard business on to clean up your mess. Is it a fetish of yours to have senior-citizen ladies who make minimum wage clean your come off the walls and floor? Or is it your special way to say "fuck you" to the working class? So to all of you folks having public sex, please remember that public places need to be cleaned by someone, and no one is paid enough to clean up the ejaculate of strangers. So have some courtesy and wipe up afterward. Thanks.