nartweag
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May 18 nartweag commented on How the Continuation of the Bernie Sanders Campaign Hurts the Chances of a Democrat-Controlled Senate.
This whole article/argument is total BULLSHIT!
.... And basically what #'s 1-6 have said.
May 3 nartweag commented on In 5-4 Vote, City Council Kills Street Vacation for New Sodo Arena.
@4 regarding this statement...
"After all, no one plays baseball when they are playing football, and no one plays basketball when they are playing either baseball or football. So wouldn't it make sense to put the stadium in the "Stadium District".

Yes! lets jack up the traffic going through/ around the stadiums on even more days of the year... It is already a total cluster fuck on game days to get from south Seattle area to ANYWHERE north... much less downtown. Traffic on game days fucks up 99 (if the viaduct ever opens again), all the even remotely close by city streets, and I5... Or did you not realize this because you are not affected by it?

It would be a great suggestion if the stupid stadiums where slightly out of town and not right in the middle of the only traffic flow Seattle has...
Apr 20 nartweag commented on Starbucks Baristas Are at Risk of Being Poked by Dirty Needles.
@8, exactly....
I do not see how this is in any way Starbucks' responsibility.... It could have been any sort of business... Just happened to be a well known one.
How is it their job to fix any issues around the drug problem in this city more so than ANY/ ALL OTHER BUSINESSES?

I would be afraid to touch, or get accidentally bumped into the outside of a sharps box in any such (non medical) setting.... that is just asking for more trouble IMHO.
Mar 17 nartweag commented on Savage Love.
@50, I was just going to mention this very fact...
For those that don't want to click the link it also states, " All members first join as Friends. Friends may attend all of our events at member attendance rates. All Friends can bring up to two non-member guests to any Center event at the guest attendance rates."
So, she will be joining at the $60 rate regardless. Also, unless she were to go ALL THE TIME (never meeting someone she liked and playing somewhere else sometimes/most of the time), it will NEVER cost that much.

Been contemplating maybe joining at the behest of a partner and a couple friends, because after a certain number of visits (not that many) it pays for itself in the difference between member and guest attendance rates.... I think there is something odd going on that she used that sort of non actual cost as a reason not to go/join....

Frankly, I feel Dan should have addressed the actual cost in the column not just for the LW but all the readers, who now think it costs that much. Also some activities cost money, that is life. It isn't any different than say, going out to eat on a date.
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Mar 3 nartweag commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Sexlessish Marriage Less Sexless During Affair.
I'm sorry but option 1, is decidedly NOT ok!
This is not a "do what you have to, to stay sane" in a marriage situation.... Not even close.
She just isn't feeling attracted to him... She is still for whatever reason, even if only occasionally, having sex with him... Getting sex outside their relationship also puts him at risk for STDs that he decidedly did not consent to...

She has option 2. Ask to open the marriage or 3. Leave.
But option 1 is just being a CPOS end of story, giving her husband a little nookie does not in any way negate that fact.
Mar 3 nartweag commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: My Sister's Womb.
Question for the LW:
You say the husband was wishy washy all these years and has now changed
his mind to a firm "no". He has apparently explained his reasoning, real,
legitimate reasons. Even if you do not agree with them, they are his to
have...
You also say (in a comment here) that the wife, your sister was 50-50 for
years and is now at 90% yes. You do not give her reasons for this change.
Likely it's just a feeling of want or a longing for "what could have been"
now that husband has said, "no"... But no real legitimate reasons have
been specifically stated.

Why does the weight of her new found "90% yes" mean more (to you or
anybody else) than his firm "no"? It seems like you have more invested in
her having kids than you let on.

Personally, I would suggest individual counseling for her to figure out
her wants/needs.

BTW: As a child-free woman I have to clarify, it isn't just woman that
pressure women (or men) to have kids. It is rather pervasive in everyday
life, and yes some families can be really terrible about it.
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Feb 3 nartweag commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: The Wife Has Issues (And a Boyfriend).
@24,25 &27

Ding, Ding and big fucking Ding.
LW, get out with your kid now! Get some therapy and learn how to set healthy boundaries and start emulating them to/with your teen, before they are out on their own.
Dec 30, 2015 nartweag commented on Savage Love.
I think one penis/pussy policies are a shitty shitty way to attempt to keep a person's (your own) jealousy in check. Couples can of course agree to whatever they want, but it seems these types of rules usually backfire if they do not get renegotiated. Despite what Allison #6 wrote they are looked down on in every poly community that I know of.

I knew of one MF couple in which the bi woman seemed to think it was fair to limit her straight husband to seeing men, as she was only interested in seeing other women (he was fine with her seeing people of any gender, btw).... So, she gets what she wants and he gets what? Oh yeah a big fat nothing. Also, when he did explore a little and play around a bit with a guy, she was decidedly NOT ok with it....

For the OP, how to get over your jealousy, well there are lots of books on that very topic. I like " More Than Two" and have heard good things about "Opening Up". I could not, however, get through "Ethical Slut" and personally do not recommend it
Nov 29, 2015 nartweag commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Poly vs. Mono, Round 4,982,475.
@30.....
I'm sure his current partners might have some opinions on things. It isn't just about if him and new person agree, current people do, ya know, give a shit about their relationships and what does and does not happen. Particularly if changes are made.

And it does sound like you don't know much about bdsm/ kink stuff.
I am not really in the scene, so I am just giving my take on what I have personally seen and experienced. If a bottom/ sub likes the kind of play that could draw blood they often have their own implements that are used on just them.
Or something like different interchangable tips on say a single tail whip ( my boyfriend has different ones for each person he uses his single tail on, as it can break skin).

Rope is another matter.
I am not sure how common this is but.... I have rope that I bought ( stays in bf's bag, it's a different color than the rest of his rope) that is ONLY used on me, for use around my genital region ( or elsewhere on me). He does not use his own rope for genital area ties... Subs/ bottoms get to buy their own for that sort of thing.

People do care about, think about and take action to minimize fluid/std issues in this regard. Does everyone, of course not.... I find it presumptuous that you seem to think nobody does. Please correct me if I misunderstood your statement.
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Nov 27, 2015 nartweag commented on Savage Love Letter of the Day: Poly vs. Mono, Round 4,982,475.
I think many of the commenters are missing this.
"I've been maintaining multiple relationships with various degrees of seriousness. Some of my partners are people in the local kink scene "

SOME, which means he has non kink partners as well.... He sounds fully poly... While some people can do mono/poly... It isn't an easy thing. I doubt he would be ok with only doing oral, piv/ pia etc.... With just one person.