I am fierce and I will kill you. I am a samurai. Look at my earrings! And my facial hair! I am also a kite, made of super-light mulberry paper and tiny, slivered bamboo spars. This is my actual size. I fly. I can fly inside buildings, float around cubicles, speed down grocery-store aisles, ride alongside escalators. I can go on trains and planes. Back when, miniature-kite-flying was a hobby of retired samurai. This fall at Paper Hammer, I will be in an art show of kites so small they can fit into the palm of your hand (1400 Second Ave, www.paper-hammer.com, Sept 19–Oct 27). I will be the biggest thing there. My maker is Nobuhiko Yoshizumi. He lives in Kyoto and is a master kite-maker—he holds the Guinness World Record for the smallest kite. By the way, do you know about the Drachen Foundation? It's the awesomest local thing that nobody has ever heard of. It's kite central. It has the world's largest kite collection (you can visit if you make an appointment at www.drachen.org) and exists entirely to tell people about kites, because they appear in pretty much every human culture. recommended