EVENT: He's the new artistic director of Northwest Asian American Theatre, where his play Porcelain--about murder in a London men's room--runs through July 1.
Have you ever wanted to kill someone? "Uhhhh... wow. Hmm. Yeah, but I don't think I can do it--I'm a big wuss. I'd probably want to destroy them mentally and emotionally. It's a Chinese thing. When you say things like, 'I'm going to get you'--but you don't tell them when. So they spend their whole life waiting for it, and when they least expect it, we're there. It's so much work, killing someone. Character assassination is so much better--"
If you don't slow down, I'll have to paraphrase what you're saying. "I can't help it, I'm on coffee. It's strange, you know, killing--why would anyone want to kill anyone? I guess I wrote a play about it. In all of my plays, people die--maybe it's a kind of therapy. You're not writing down everything I'm saying, are you? Because I'm probably revealing things I shouldn't...."
I'm just trying to keep up. "You can't remember everything I just said, can you? Are we still on the first question? What's the second question? Are you still typing? You've got a good memory. Unless you're lying."
I was originally thinking that you really only want to kill people that you feel most drawn to. "I usually want to sleep with people I'm drawn to, but if they won't.... It takes a certain personality to kill. I only want to kill people who make you sit through long, tedious plays and make you pay. No comps. And killing takes so much effort. You might not get away with it--you'll end up like Barbara Stanwyck."
In Double Indemnity? "The longest death in the world. Before I die, I think I'll put my thoughts on a tape recorder."
Why? "Remember the movie? He begins by saying he's shot--"
That's Fred MacMurray. "Right. He took forever to die. She died really quickly, with great backlighting. That's the way to go."
