In just two short years, The Stranger's HUMP! became the Northwest's premier amateur and locally produced porn contest. Older, more established amateur porn contests can't hold a candle to HUMP! No one even talks about the Seattle Art Museum's amateur porn contest ("Ram SAM") anymore, to say nothing of the Tacoma Museum of Glass's amateur porn contest ("Museum of Ass!"), or the Experience Music Project and Science Fiction Museum's amateur solo-masturbation porn contest ("Blasting Off with Paul Allen!"). Nope, if you're making amateur porn or interested in amateur porn, HUMP! is your film festival!
Last year's HUMP! was a gushing success. Dozens of films shown; 10 screenings sold out. Thousands of sex-positive Seattleites laughed, shrieked, blushed, guffawed, and applauded as their fellow citizens stripped down, bared all, and struck a blow—sometimes numerous blows—for freedom of sexual expression. HUMP! 2 audiences were treated to scorchin' hot lawn boys, buckets of female ejaculate, monster cocks, slow-motion ass slaps, horny condiments, the triumphant return of Bo Logan, and the dirtiest, most hilarious game of Mousetrap ever committed to film.
What's in store for HUMP! 3? That's up to YOU, our sex-positive, infinitely perverse, thoroughly creative readers. You make HUMP! happen!
LONGER, HARDER, MORE!
WHO CAN MAKE A FILM FOR HUMP?
Anyone can—but YOU should! We've designed HUMP! to make it safe, fun, and anonymous. All entries are kept under lock and key. We make only two screening copies and return the originals to the filmmakers. Our copies are destroyed live onstage after the final screening. We've hosted DOZENS of HUMP! screenings with ZERO leaks! No one has been outed, nothing has wound up online. HUMP! is safe, it's fun, and we put it together so that you can be a porn star for a weekend—not for life!
DO I HAVE TO SHOW MY FACE?
You don't have to show your face. You can wear a mask, makeup, or a hood—whatever floats your boat. We do, however, need proof of age on file for everyone in a HUMP! film—and no one sees the paperwork but us. You can star in HUMP! totally anonymously!
DO HUMP! ENTRIES HAVE TO BE HARDCORE?
No! Erotica, animation, instructional videos, freaky stuff, and funny, sexy shorts all have a home in HUMP! Last year, HUMP! audiences awarded first place to a film without any actual penetration and fourth place to shot-on-cell-phone erotic short starring a saltshaker and a napkin! Anything goes at HUMP!
HOW MUCH TIME DO I HAVE TO MAKE A FILM?
Tons! The deadline for HUMP! submissions is Monday, September 10, 2007.
WHEN IS HUMP?
This year's festival goes down on October 5 and 6, 2007.
PRIZES!
Two $2,000 first-place prizes will be awarded this year: Best Hardcore Entry and Best Erotic or Humor Entry. And who picks the winners? HUMP!'s audience!
THE DIRTY DETAILS
• The deadline for entries is Monday, September 10, 2007.
• Videos can be submitted on DVD or VHS.
• Films need to be NO longer than eight minutes.
• No children, no animals, no poop.
• Films must be submitted with proof that everyone involved is at least 18 years of age. Entry forms can be downloaded at www.thestranger.com/hump. The paperwork is mandatory!
HOW TO EARN EXTRA CREDIT!
All HUMP! entries will receive at least one screening. But a jury of sex experts, sex-positive film critics, and sex-obsessed porn fans select HUMP! entries for the Grand Prize Competition. We look for quality and hotness—films don't have to be slick, just hot—and entries made especially for HUMP! get extra credit. So get a leg up in porn by proving that you made your film just for HUMP! by including one—or all!—of these props or locations in your HUMP! entry:
• Ravenna Alehouse T-shirt (prop)
• McCormick & Schmick's matchbook (prop)
• Ivar Haglund bobblehead doll (prop, available at www.ivars.net)
• SAM's Olympic Sculpture Park (location)
• The Space Needle (location)
• Ken Schram (prop and location)
