If you've seen the trailer for Paul, you've probably wondered why it isn't funny. The movie is directed by Superbad's Greg Mottola, it stars and was written by Simon Pegg and Nick Frost, and it appears to be some kind of Shaun of the Dead–meets-E.T. sci-fi comedy, which sounds promising. Further, the cast includes every single funny person in Hollywood today: Jeffrey Tambor, Jane Lynch, Seth Rogen, Jason Bateman, Bill Hader, and Kristen Wiig. With all that talent, how did they manage to make an unfunny trailer? Does a trailer editor somewhere need to get fired? But no, the answer is both simple and unfortunate: This movie is profoundly unfunny.

Pegg and Frost play two nerdy British friends who, after visiting San Diego Comic-Con for the first time, take a road trip in a Winnebago to visit famous UFO-related sites of the Southwest. They come across Paul (voiced by Seth Rogen, doing his best Seth Rogen impersonation), an alien with a gruff voice who is often rude, even though he has a heart of gold beating somewhere beneath that diminutive alien exterior. He teaches his adopted humans to loosen up and enjoy life. Yes, just like ALF. They basically remade ALF into a road trip comedy with more swears and the occasional genital joke.

Not that that's necessarily a bad idea, but there's not one original joke or, hell, even one original concept in this entire movie. The only glimmers of salvation come in spite of all the mediocrity: Bateman brings a casual sense of menace to his federal agent, and Wiig finds the sweet, likable reality in a character who is no more than a doltish Christian stereotype. Tired references to Star Trek, Close Encounters of the Third Kind, and E.T. (the alien likes Reese's Pieces! Get it?) get trotted out at the appropriate points, in the hopes that sci-fi nerds will show up to "get" the "joke," but they shouldn't take the geek-bait: Paul is a lazy wank of a movie that exploits nerd culture and gives nothing back in return.