In these Uncertain Economic Times™, any newspaper giving away tens of thousands of dollars in arts grants every year—and throwing a big-ass party for the city to celebrate—would have to be run by crazy people. Fortunately for all of you, we're crazy people. Come celebrate the artists: ejaculatory sculptor/drawer Jeffry Mitchell, hiphop filmmaker Zia Mohajerjasbi, funny freaks the Cody Rivers Show, modern mythmaker Stacey Levine, and the newly invigorated and sexed-up Pacific Northwest Ballet. And hear the music: Throw Me the Statue, They Live!, U.S.F., Emerald City Soul Club. And drink and dance and make out in the dark corners of the Moore Theatre. It's gonna be fun. (Moore Theatre, 1932 Second Ave, thestranger.com/genius. 9 pm, $5, 21+.)