Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow at the Wall Street Protests

I wasn’t able to make it down to the Occupation yesterday because I had to work late, and then go to an Explosions in the Sky concert in New Jersey early. I know, I know, I turned my back on the movement.

Really, I felt a little weird not making it down there—almost guilty. Almost.

But it also gave me some time to reflect. I think the best result so far of the Occupation (I’m talking about Wall Street, not Palestine! Relax, Evergreen!), is that it looks like it’s turning into a broader movement. Occupations have popped up from Boston to Hilo, HI, and everywhere in between. At least according to the New York Times, which is actually covering this thing with more and more frequency.

Although I’m sure they hate it, what I’ve heard a lot in the press is that the Occupy Wall Street people are the left’s answer to the Tea Party—which I think is apt, and actually good. The Tea Party basically foiled real health care reform and made racism fashionable again. Why not have something to counter that? Then everybody else can meet in the middle and chat like adults.

I do think that if they become a larger movement they will have their work cut out for them, since they are liberals, and as liberals we have the uphill battle of being the Upholders of Decency (said into a microphone with echo). I tried to write a joke last year about how hard it is to stay competitive with conservatives, because we have to play by all the rules and they get to break all of them. It went something like this:

Imagine a slalom ski race. (And I only choose that because I look like the kind of bully who challenges you to a ski race. SEE YOU ON THE K12!) Liberals have to hit every gate, with the gates being “Don’t say anything offensive about your opponents” (even if its true), “Don’t forget to include everyone” (even if they carry a ferret), and “Don’t get caught having any kind of above average quality of life” (cause your opponents will call you a hypocrite). Conservatives just shoot down the hill, dismissing all of those gates, calling us “queeerrrs!!!” and finishing first in the eyes of their constituents. We have to act like that’s a fair race, or we’re poor losers.

It was not a funny joke.

It makes me think about Goldy’s post about the effectiveness of violence, and how violence, or at least some mischief, might have some credence at this point. Now, I’ve never been patient about these things. I’ve thought from the beginning of this: Why don’t we just head to the array of private liberal arts colleges around the Northeast, kidnap a bunch of the Bankers’ drunk and stoned fornicating kids, and hold them until the Bankers pay off our student loans, medical bills, and my Columbia House membership?

That’s a rhetorical question based on a fantasy, people, not a command! But in my fantasy, the kidnappers say I inspired them and it helps sell tickets to my live show.

Anyway, that’s not what the Occupation is about. They’re about peace, and patience, and digging in—which they should, cause New York is already cold and winter’s coming.

Today protestors are headed to Jersey City to demonstrate in front of the Goldman Sachs headquarters. Tomorrow could be the largest protest yet, with the labor unions calling for a day long-strike and a march to City Hall, or Union Square, or Times Square (just please don’t try and go to Brooklyn again, please).

I’ll be there, sticking out, looking like a CIA agent who shops at J Crew.