Dick’s in Edmonds: The top story in the Everett Herald covers the beloved local franchise’s northern expansion. It’s a good day in Edmonds.

Vendetta: “‘I will spend my last dying breath if I need to, and I will spend every penny of Apple’s $40bn in the bank, to right this wrong,’ Jobs told Isaacson. ‘I’m going to destroy Android, because it’s a stolen product. I’m willing to go thermonuclear war on this.'”

Hertz Fires Muslims in Sea-Tac: Apparently, Hertz’ 25 Muslim employees weren’t clocking out for prayer breaks, and after union negotiations broke down, they were all fired.

Four Times an Hour: Someone in America completes suicide every fifteen minutes, according to a new CDC study. The report also notes that 6.8% of adults in Utah have serious thoughts of suicide.

Republicans Hate Firefighters and Teachers: Yesterday, all 50 47 Republican senators voted against a provision of the American Jobs Act that would have raised $35 billion in taxes to create or preserve local and state teaching and firefighting jobs.

Where Do You Bury a Dictator? Libyans try to answer the question.

The Free Market Sets Wireless Profits High: As is evident from Verizon’s $1.38 billion profit posting from last quarter.

Fish Farm Proposed in the Strait: The new fish farm would be the first in decades, and would produce 10 million pounds of different varieties of salmon annually. Of course, there are environmental concerns with such a large expansion.

WSDOT’s Come to Jesus Moment: Everyone is waiting with bated breath to see the outcome of tonight’s nine day Alaskan Way Viaduct closure. “Via Con Dios” is the sentiment used to describe the event on the WSDOT twitter.

“Lohan Shows Up Early for Morgue Duty”: Notorious shitshow Lindsay Lohan showed up an hour and a half early to her community service at the morgue in Los Angeles County.

Here’s a shout out to an old a cappella buddy, in honor of Michael Jackson.

14 replies on “The Morning News”

  3. What? Jobs, please. Android is not a stolen product. All mobile OS and hardware was going this route.

    Candybar, non-flip phones were making a comeback. Hardware tech was was evolving towards affordable touch sizes to enable mass produced premium phones. Mobile software has been an app/grid layout for ever.

    Apple just applied their attention to detail, and standard Evolution (not revolution) they are absolute masters at. My house and pockets have been running lovely Apple hardware and software forever, but Android stealing anything non-obvious from the product space’s current trajectory, it did not. The iPhone just pushed the fast forward button for a few seconds.

  6. I looked at the pics from the opening of Dicks in Edmonds. I haven’t seen so many fat old white people since the Tea Baggers were at West Lake last summer.

  8. Oh, and the US announced two days ago all our troops in Iraq are being pulled out over the next two months.

    Not like all the trillions of tax dollars, millions killed, and thousands of American soldiers dying for that clvsterfvck matter …

    P.S.: Hils got whined at by Pakistan for the US being an annoying mother-in-law. Guess it’s ok when your son-in-law is a murderous lying bastard, right?

  10. Well, it certainly isn’t the geography in Utah to blame. The Wasatch, the powder skiing, the Canyonlands, etc., etc. I wonder what it could be.

  11. @4 I thought the same thing. Do you know if Jobs gave them any exclusive “look” at the iPhone? It seems like for awhile they had a really close development relationship, so maybe he felt slighted. It reminds me of the PARC mess, as if Gates “stole” anything Jobs didn’t.

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