That what’s ensuing now as the result of this sad tale about a couple of pre-ordered PS3 controllers and a theatrically douchebaggy retailer.

As Gabe says, “Trust me when I tell you that this is one wild ride. I’m serious, Mr. Toad would look at this ride and just give a slow clap while shaking his head.” If you like Internet drama and harsh justice on the gamer frontier, check it out for yourself.

The Stranger Testing Department is Rob Lightner, Paul Hughes, and Mary P. Traverse.

38 replies on “Penny Arcade-Powered Shitstorm”

  9. Textbook example of how not to treat customers. Amazon is filling up with bad reviews, Googling for “Ocean Marketing” is a minefield, etc.

  12. Sorry- I don’t think this is Gabe trying to form an army. I’m very, VERY happy that he is posting this. It means I can make an educated decision regarding frequenting Ocean Marketing ever. This douche-nozzle who wrote the emails is what’s causing this shit-storm. Not Gabe. Don’t shoot the messenger thank you.

  16. @14 I believe the original image is actually from Paul Christoforo’s Facebook page.

    This saga has to be some kind awesome hoax, right? It’s too perfect.

  18. I love this debacle SO MUCH. That follow-up about his apparent forum habits is just the absolute cherry on top.

    ESTROGEN STRATAGY -or – BRO I GOTTA GET SUM FISHEZ FOR MAH BITCH SHE LOVES THEM PINKY ONES WHAT YOU DON’T HAVE PINKY ONES U ARE SO WORTHLESS I WILL HAVE BOSTON PUNCH YOUR FACE

  19. I love the city of Boston, but man, there are some spectacular douchenozzles that come out of that place. I love the link @14. This scandal is of course the first thing that comes up when you google “avenger controller” or “ocean marketing”. True genius at work here.

  21. I feel pretty bad for the company that actually, you know, makes the controller. If they’re stuck outsourcing their PR shit to a PR shit like Paul Christoforo, I’d imagine it’s because they’re not a big operation, and now their product is going to tank not on its own merits but because of how some third-party asshole treated customers.

    Although from reading further back, about a similar situation another customer got into back in February, it sounds like this sort of thing- huge delays of shipments from China- is a recurring problem. So Ocean is not wholly to blame.

    Still, shitty situation to be in.

  22. @21 that’s precisely what makes this so fascinating. Nobody was to blame, and nobody was looking for blood. But Paul/Ocean had to make it about being a jerk and is reaping the benefits of that as we speak… 🙂

  26. I’m just glad that, in this case, it’s pretty clear that the guy is getting what he deserves. Some people (like the editor of The Stranger) are known for jumping the gun when unleashing the flying monkeys of the internet.

  30. @24 You know…I don’t mind Hulk Rage Gabe. HR Gabe always picks some amazing battles. Jack Thompson was an amazing battle that needed to be fought (you do know who he is, right? If you don’t, you should read up on him). And this battle was a sort of small-time prick that needed to be taken down a few notches.

    The whole scenario kind of reminds me of a certain somebody who writes for The Stranger. But, I think Gabe/Mike actually is a bit more cautious with the battles he chooses to engage in than the certain somebody around here with flying monkeys.

  32. As an old fart, I can’t believe how quickly this moves; but the video is hilarious. His suddenly meek “apologies” aren’t helping. Hope he enjoys his 15 minutes, although I bet he imagined it would be for something else…

  33. @19, I may be over defending my city here, and I don’t have the time to research where this guy is really from, but I’d like to think not Boston. Little Italy isn’t actually a neighborhood (unless he means the North End, but no one calls it anything other than the North End).

  34. @24, Yeah, the whole thing turned out kinda like the end of DEATH PROOF. It wwould be sad if he didn’t deserve it. (I’m not fixing that typo, for obvious reasons)

    @33 Oh this guy is definitely from around here. Maybe from the North Shore (or even Worcester!) and likes to say he’s “from Boston”. But this guy is a Masshole through and through.
    (I always felt that instead of doing continuing seasons of Jersey Shore MTV should have iterated— taken the setting nationwide from season to season starting with a show called “Massholes”.)

  36. @24: “I know Gabe loves Spiderman, but he’s coming off as more of an Incredible Hulk here, I think.”

    I don’t think Ocean necessarily needs to get stomped to the ground, but the overpaid, underqualified violent manbaby should never ever work in that field again.

  37. Whoops, Ocean necessarily needs to be stomped down, but the company that *hired* Ocean shouldn’t deserve all the negativity that that he spawned.

Comments are closed.