Crisis in Six Scenes is an appropriate moniker for Woody Allen’s latest project, since the present iteration of his brand is crisis. To be an Allen apologist in 2016 (which I, for better or worse, but mostly worse, am) is to join a club any rational human being would refuse to be a member of.
My beleaguered brethren and I congregate in alleyways and dark corners of bars and speak reverently of the man’s work in hushed tones, afraid the governing body of what is and is not okay will discover our indiscretions and sic Twitter mobs on us. It’s one thing for Scarlett Johansson and Diane Keaton to defend the man, but they’re not people—they’re celebrities. For private citizens, the act is unilaterally perceived as an unforgivable transgression.